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C O L O U R S
January 30, 2004 COLOURED.


*note
what u're about to c now is all tech talk...
if u wish to be spared from all the nerd talk...
press ctrl + f...
and type in 'end of pro talk'

wonder why i didnt post yesterday?
was busy trying to figure out norton...
and getting the right configurations...
yea i know some time ago i said norton was shit...

but u cant say its shit when u get so many good reviews...
ive been doing my research these past few days on security...
ever since that novarg worm started...
my company was hit wif that worm...
onli 1 user was affected...
the rest juz got the auto mail list...
i juz have to question the intelligence of the users...
surely they are not as dumb as first-timers using the internet rite...
warnings about opening strange attachments...
yet they still open them out of curiousity...
for goodness sake, no one will send u porn pics unless u request for it...

i wasnt testing out NAV alone...
i got norton internet security pro 2004...
that package comes wif nav, firewall, and some good shit...
and since its own firewall oso got good reviews, i thought why not...
too bad its 15 day trial is too damn irritating...
tried getting rid of it but it doesnt work...
gave up after a few tries...
it was leeching watever few resources i have left...
and that sickening message which keeps popping out...
and it bloody lags the whole system...

in the end, i guess its just a matter of personal taste...
what ppl like doesnt really suits u as well...
zonealarm pro n norton firewall were joint tops in zdnet...
but the difference between the two is a bit too large...
norton firewall is pretty secure...
perhaps too secure, i cant play neopets properly...
even though i have edited some of the settings...
zonealarm is user-friendly and veri idiot-friendly as well...
the onli bad thing is u either let it all in or let it all out...
norton provides more control...

antivirus-wise, virtually everyone is using NAV...
im pleased with my free avg...
although i was kinda tempted to get NAV...
rated the highest in most tests...
but viruses arnt that important...
trojans are the real threat...

u will shit the hell out of ur pants...
if u realised that trojans are residing in ur pc...
all ur passwords can be seen by some guys munching on chips...
ever seen ur bank account balance decreasing by the day?

while surfing i happen to come across this special site...
which gives me a real insight of wat hackers do...
for the first time of my life, i felt that nothing is secure at all...
antivirus, firewalls arnt enuf to stop hackers from invading...
if u tink that ur pc isnt that attractive enuf for them, tink again...
every fast connection is a potential zombie or bot as they call it...
u could be attacking somebody's website without realising it...

last but not least...
anyone interested in marketing should learn from EE...
look at their hard sell methods and laugh...
be amazed by their sick tactics which actually work...

*end of pro talk

u should have probably know by now...
that i was a damsel in mistress...
it happened again yesterday morning...
should i say it wasnt even raining at all...
juz a bit of drops here n there...
not big enuf to seek shelter...

yet the knight in shining armor came and offer her umbrella...
i was made to be a damsel in mistress for the 2nd time...
this time it was serene...

i tink i can banish the thought of chasing gers...
when i have the courage to do that i duno...
even if i do, i wun know how to treat them right...

so there she was, holding the umbrella for me...
she was clearly feeling uncomfortable...
me being taller, she has to hold it up higher...
one hand carrying her big bag, another hand carrying some books...
add to that holding of umbrella...
and me, i actually let her continue to hold the umbrella...
not a very good gentleman huh...

i wanted to hold it, but i duno how to make her let go...
but i finally came to my senses...
i juz took the handle from her...
surprisingly she didnt put up a struggle...
u know some will go 'aiya, neber mind la i will hold it'...
and she didnt look at me wif surprise...
it was almost like she was expecting me to do it...

which comes to the conclusion...
i duno what the opposite sex is thinking...
and i suck at guessing wats on their minds...
i prefer it if they say it directly...
forget about being romantic or whatever...
romantic ppl onli exist becos they have cheated countless ppl liao...
enuf to charm the shit out of anyone alive...

and this is for the charmless ones...

he tinks hes educated
airs those family share
will protect him that we will respect him
he moves in circles of friends
who just pretend that they like him
he does the same to them
and when u put it all together
there's the model of a charmless man

he talks at speed he gets nose bleeds
he doesnt see his days
are tumbling down upon him
and yet tries so hard to please
he's just so keen for you to listen
but no one is listening
and when u put it all together
theres the model of a charmless man


"she is so high, i want to crawl all over her - hong"

9:54 PM

January 28, 2004 COLOURED.


i can go to the company lunch after all...
raffles marina, i thought some place far away...
maybe in changi perhaps...
then i so happy, going there will waste a lot of time...
but i didnt know that raffles marina is in tuas...
3 minute drive from the workplace sia...

where would this place exists in such a ulu area...
maybe it has to do wif the waters...
there were many yachts around...
my supervisor told me that pauline the secretary's yacht resides here...
yesh, u heard that right, secretary actually owns a yacht...
and she lives in it too...
how do u slp when it keeps drifting away...
now i know y she sports a dark tan...

as we head upstairs to the restaurant...
guess who i saw...
freaking christine in a cheongsam with a very very short hairdo!
okay, its a lookalike...
now then i realise gers in cheongsams can look so good...
they shouldnt let those old ladies or SM lee's wife wear...
give the younger generation chance mah...
for a moment i wonder whats so good abt OL after all...
not old fashioned at all, and incredibly sexy...
all it needs is a trigger to set off a new trend...

her name's tina and she's a trainee...
no not that 38 tina...
its the christine tina...
if u wondering since when i become so bold...
u will be feeling disappointed...
all of them were sporting nametags...
whatever, gives me a good excuse to look at her chest...
if theres any at all that is...

jasmine tea: free frag
duno wat flavour rice: $5
glutinous ball wif red bean soup: $10
snow fish: $25
yusheng: $20
roast chicken: $20
shark fin: $50
sea cucumber wif abalone: $50
bill for 4 tables: $2089
up close n personal wif tina's boobs: priceless

there are some things money cant buy...

i dun see wat wrong wif failing the 1.7m criteria...
obviously the tall ones dun know what they are realli missing...
when im seated down, what do i c on eye level...
juz her chest, nothing else...
okie, its the shiny nametag that is distracting me...
if hers grow any bigger...
her boobs would have brushed against my face...
and on more than 1 occasion too...
maybe i did it on purpose...
i emptied my cup as soon as she refilled it...
juz count the number of trips she has to make...
although she wasnt the only 1 around of cos...
sometimes the aunties will do it...

if theres anything wrong wif the restaurant...
it has to be the serving time...
waiting 20mins in between dishes almost all the time...
start at 12noon, by 1pm, onli 2 dishes were served...
and everything lasted for two and a half hours...
which suits me very well...
at least i can slack more...
go back work oso duno can do wat...
nothing much to do yet dun wan to do anything...
they talk their business talk to kill time...
boring stuff everyday, dun know what are they saying...
so all i could do is stare at the only bright spark around...
tina's the only young one, the rest all grandmothers pattern...

oh and u should hear her speak...
from the way she speak everyone knows shes from china...
but her cheena is extra special...
different from wat u hear from those construction workers 1...
she speaks absolute elegant chinese...
and im simply amazed by her strength...
so small n fragile...
yet she can carry all the plates n bowls for a table wif juz 1 hand...

moral of the story...
we can neber underestimate the power of girls...
u know how much force is needed to push approx 2.5kg out of a small vagina?
its like squeezing an elephant in a 1X1 box...
the onli difference is the elephant feels the pain, the box doesnt...
while the vagina is torn to shreds, and the baby burst out laughing wif tears...
take note, thats another big reason why i dun like kids...
born to make their parents suffer, neber give them time to relax...
i know, becos im a kid...
and i guess everyone made their parents suffer...
some did try to make their parents' lives better...
but its never enuf to repay them back...
now i guess u can c that the government is sexist...
all the baby bonus, all fake ppl one...
they love to torture women...

shall end off wif a oldie song...
no new cds to listen loh...

so give me some sex and tv easily
ive seen so much, im going blind
and braindead virtually
socialability is hard enough for me
take me away from this big bad world
and agree to marry me so we can start over again

if u're a Blur fan, u knoe that the lyrics wrong...
becos i dun like coffee at all :D

"u c the big picture? - hong"

9:58 PM

January 27, 2004 COLOURED.


guess wat, there was an ang bao for me after all...
but they still suck! :D

after all even the cleaning auntie got 1...
if i dun have, i might as well be beggar on the streets liao...

11:23 AM

January 26, 2004 COLOURED.


bird flu bird flu...
everyone's scared of the birds now...
no chicken, no duck, no goose, no pigeon...
which is very fine by me...
no one to fight over for queue liao...
and the chicken rice stallholder c me so happy...

all of them asked i not scared ar...
i tink everything has been blown out of proportion...
exactly like the sars thing...
i never forget the way they closed swimming pools...
juz for the 1 or 2 deaths mean no food at all?
say 1 or 2 humans die...
why dun u exterminate the whole fucking population...
all da jing xiao guai over trivial matters...
juz like ppl who spend their whole lives worrying...
worry this worry that, never have a sense of peace...
never know how to enjoy, how to slack, how to sleep...

anyway when u're gifted the chance to die...
u juz grab hold of it and dun let go...
it gives u the chance to confess a lot of things...
u can say all the bad things u have done in ur short life...
rape, robbery, murder, forgery, espionage...
no matter how bad u are, ppl will still treat u like angel...
which also brings us to the main point...
u can oso confess u have fetish in smelling monitors...
licking ur armpit hair, getting electrocuted, bla bla...
and u can say i have never like u at all...
i juz used u all along becos u are so dumb like grass, Wa Ha Ha...
or the more common i have been keeping this in my heart all the time...
i love you even though i pretended we're juz ordinary frens...
u know battle royale n the sequel does that...
ppl onli confess when they're on the verge of death...

y so, we all have this bad habit...
failure is never an option...
die die must succeed...
wait kena reject then sian diao...
spend the rest of the life haizing away liao...

actually its quite a good tactic...
most of the time u will succeed...
she will say yes juz to make u happy b4 u die...
or she realli loves you, which u'll regret on ur way to hell...
both ways, its a big YES...

if for some unknown reason u managed to survive...
and she having said yes juz to make u happy...
will be cursing ur damned miracle...
and praying so hard that u die one more time...
becos that means both of u will be together...
u know la, ppl all wan to save face 1...
if she go back on her promise...
then many ppl will gossip gossip...
then she xia suay n malu...
so bo bian have to stick to u...

sometimes things dun go according to plan...
juz like defects in some products...
results do go unexpectedly...
she will say the dreaded NO...
but u dun get to lose out at all...
cos she's the one to blame for causing ur death...
and u dun realli like her at all...
u juz confess becos she's the onli female around...
while u eagerly await to stalk BoA as a wandering ghost...

maybe u realli like her yet she still rejected u...
the last thing u could do is say nasty thngs to her...
like "u bitch", "u old hag", "u yellow faced monkey"...
or if u cant bear to scold her becos u like her too much...
juz go ahead and molest her...
or if u still have the strength which i highly doubt...
juz rape the shit out of her...
u can forfeit the strokes of the cane since u'll be dead soon...

and i ate alone today...
it wasnt supposed to be that way though
they told me to come along...
and the moment i turned my head...
the whole office is empty, onli left me...
nvm i thought, i can eat slowly liao...
then i saw its raining outside...
i thought i was never going to have my lunch now...
luckily 10 mins later it was a slight drizzle onli...
when i came back my supervisor asked me "i thought u going wif us"
yea rite, pls try to make it more real...
juz faking it isnt the solution...
if they really meant it, couldnt they wait...
instead of driving off and then realise i was not present...
and they juz go oh where's the temp staff...
neber mind, he'll settle by himself...
these kind of fucked up ppl...
i dun blame them, i dun like the places they go to eat...
always some pieces of shit here n there...
but i dun like the way they left me in the office when its raining...
if the rain continues, u can be sure i will be very pissed...

oh ya, BoA's coming to singapore...
most prolly to get best korean act i assume...
about time 2, hu the hell is jtl to get the award twice...
ask any singaporean out there on the streets to name a korean star...
and u'll get BoA, song hae hyo, jeol ji hyun (spell) as their answers...
duno whether wan to go catch her or not...
most prolly many guys will be camping liao...
all claiming to be bf la, hubby...
all the lame stuff that gers do for f4, 5566...
gers can understand, guys like idiots like that...

"shock is entertainment - hong"

11:08 PM

January 25, 2004 COLOURED.


i have been pumping my chest way too much...
totally neglect my triceps and stomach...
i cant even do a single 2.5 on triceps...
never do situps of crunches since duno when liao...
no etoiles no motivation...

and my chest look like balloons...
which is a good thing...
u can forget abt the stomach...
since the upper body is bigger...
so the stomach seems like got train 1...
ur eyes are playing tricks on u...
so never ever believe wat u c wif ur own eyes...
trust ur instinct, its ur best ally...

irreversible is going to be shown on sg cinemas...
i wonder wat the board of censors will give...
most prolly R(A)...
if its NC16, then good for those horny bastards...
but i hope this movie comes wif a health warning...

ppl suffering from motion sickness must avoid this movie at all cost...
and pls dun have a full meal b4 watching...
the camera spinning is not a very good experience...
i saw it wif an empty stomach...
and my stomach was feeling funny...

and if u're one who cant take repeated flashing...
dun watch, dun even tink of risking it juz to c monica bellucci...
if a kid can die from watching pokemon cartoon that features flashing...
u should have seen the flashing in the movie...
dun wait till the end, it juz show u a line...
which the naked man said in the beginning...

guess i have to adjust my timetable abit...
i need to get out on saturdays...
i need to start running...
i need to start swimming...
i need to get back to borders...
i need to get back to hmv...
i need to do situps...
i need to do pushups...
i need to work on pullups...

"humans are born racists" - hong

10:50 PM


plain infatuation or true love...
the new will always replace the old...
i dun think u can realli call that love...
we juz neber grow up...
always like to tink we are in the right...
and they are always in the wrong...
all humans are born selfish...
we have our own desired endings...
even though the conclusion has already been drawn...
but so what, the desired finale is still playing in our minds...

look at the lead character in Brazil...
he was dead, yet we see him still alive...
ppl coming to save his sorri ass and he go to some ulu place wif his angel...
we are all living a dream, juz living in a dream...

sometimes i cant figure out who's the real loner here...
everyone claims to be one wif their wonderfully well-planned lies...
of cos they're telling their stories as they see it...
which is the bloody dream that they're imagining...

as they held me close and asked if i will rememeber them
i've said. "yes, i will remember you"
but the only one that i've never forgotten
is the one who never asked
- Renato Amoruso "Malena"

on a rainy day, u juz wan to stay home and relac one corner...
so i didnt go to my relatives house...
neither did i go to the outing...
go there oso duno do wat loh...
i juz wanna get out asap hanging wif a bunch...
i fear big crowds man, can pee in my pants one...

last piece of advice...
if any government ever bans prostitution...
they must be out of their minds...
any religious freaks out there who think that banning prostitution will purify our 'sorry' souls must have peas for brains...
sex crimes will multiply a thousandfold...
becos wat they use to do legally is now illegal...
its juz like banning cigarettes totally...

and babies ought to be put in jail for their hideous crimes...
how they managed to get away scot-free i have no idea...
they grope and the victims laugh...
babies are not innocent creatures i tell u...
they are so damn smart...
which brings me to the belief that humans get dumber as we get older...
ever heard of senile occuring at a young age???
look, lets face it...
babies can control their tear ducts...
which most of us cant do, unless we're professionals in acting...
they dun make noise when it is the time to wake up...
they onli make noise when u are in the middle of rem...
they dun shit when they're wearing diapers...
they onli shit when they're wearing some nice clothes...
and they have the freedom of groping anyone they fancy...
u dun c any ger saying "So CUte" to u so sweetly, when ur hand is placing on her boob...
babies get away wif juz a smile...
try smiling to a ger like that n u get 10 yrs in jail + some lovebites on ur butt...
and mind u, babies are not heterosexual...
babies are in fact bisexual...
the lil bastard grab my dick while i was having dinner...
lucky they were too young to enter gym...
otherwise my face will turn purple...

"fantasy n reality... its distinct, no thin line - hong"

12:04 AM

January 23, 2004 COLOURED.


excellent singlish rojak mixed wif broken english, cheena, hokkien, malay...
anyone who understand me is a true blue singaporean...
anyone who frowns upon is trying to be a banana... white inside, yellow outside...
anyone who finds it amusing is a true non-singaporean...
why the government wan to stop us making them laugh i have no idea...
we make good public relations with foreign countries u know...

u will never find me conversing in a single language...
sometimes i try...
but subconciously i managed to blurt out a foreign language...
speak chinese wif a bit of hokkien to a cantonese...
speak english wif a bit of chinese to a malay...
speak english and chinese to some old ppl who onli understand dialects...
its a natural ability which others find it hard to emulate...
most singaporeans can do it...
and thats the problem for u when u're living in a country...
where u have to learn so many languages...
but at least we are better than some other countries...
try listening to jacky wu's english and we all laugh...
open ur ears big big and hear some honkies speak proper cheena...

it wun be long b4 i start to add new languages to stun the world outside singapore...
japanese, korean, thai, cantonese, italian, french, spanish...
out of these 7 new languages...
onli 2 will have a more realistic chance of making it...
the rest are juz one liners...
learnt thai from spending 4 months in golden mile...
all the numbers and some colors...
and that infamous bra size...
i never understand what they mean when they approach me wif the bra...
and keep saying "leg leg" or "jai jai" or "sai merai"
my colleagues were laughing their asses out when i ask them wat customers wanted...
pardon the spellings, i duno how they are spelt the correct way...
juz based on their pronounciations...

edward norton...
u saw him in american history x?
did u see his body in that film?
that is the body for man...
if u cant even reach that standard...
juz go back and play wif barbie dolls la...
dun accept anything less than that...
i need some time to hit that level though...
if im not wrong...
the free bar bench press he was doing while in jail was 35kg...
im currently on a 30, so at least not bad la...
quite soon can reach the target liao...

and ppl who actually claim that mayday is a rock band...
realli are deaf or they have neber heard rock b4...
its more of a band sound...
exactly the same as saying ELT is a rock band...
does mayday dishes out good head-banging sounds? nah...
why they have so many fans i duno...
and most of them are females...
imagine slipknot having more female fans than males...
50,000 females waving their middle fingers around...
and chanting 'fuck, fuck, fuck'...
now thats some sick scene...
a disturbing scene for any movie-maker wannabe...

people = shit

4:29 PM

January 22, 2004 COLOURED.


i duno wat happened last night...
the fireworks were there all right...
but they were far too distant for me to take a proper picture...
at least NYE that time is much closer and bigger...
too much clouds last night liao...

and everyone was sleeping early???
by 11pm i was the only one left standing...
usually my father will wait past midnight before offering incense...
good, it means i can watch sex is zero...
and to think i nearly got my sister to watch it wif me...
sex is zero doesnt mean no sex at all...
10 minutes going into the movie and theres nudity...
the show was labelled comedy wat...
and korean shows are quite gd at comedy or horror...
somemore koreans are more conversative when it comes to sex...
big no-no to sex, big yes-yes to plastic surgery...
koreans sure are weird...

anyway i was dragged out of bed early today...
everyone was all dressed up and ready to go...
no breakfast, only drink some cereal powder...
no time to bathe too, they juz throw the clothes at me...

this year is so different...
i dun get excited over getting ang baos anymore...
compared to my peers whose relatives all so bloody rich...
my ang bao money all small fries 1...
im lucky enuf to have a godmother...
*hint hint* she always gives more than my mother...

if i dun even bother to buy new clothes...
and i never cut my hair for the first time b4 CNY...
u know that i rather prefer to stay at home and slack away...

everyone was taking a look at my uncle's new condo...
i wanted one when i grow up...
but based on the size, its not very family-friendly...
more suitable for a couple alone...
maybe wif 1 kid perhaps, but no more...
hmm, maybe without kids is much better...
u can do all sorts of kinky stuff whereever u wan...

i wan a long and deep pool...
i wan a gym wif proper equipment...
i wan a sauna n jacuzzi...
and the pool must not be right in front of the gate entrance...
i dun mind other ppl watching...
but i do mind if the security guard is watching...
wait he totally 4get about his job and let many strangers come in...
in the end, its juz a dream...
im not some rich person...
and my parents are not rich too...
how long do i have to slog to earn a condo...
50 or 60 yrs old?
by that time then enjoy abit the too late liao...
maybe i have to moonlight as a gigolo to speed up the process...
lol, need someone to help advertise my services...

SMRT is a perverted company...
it claimed to be user-friendly...
making elevators compulsory on every station...
so nice right, make for those who walk veri slow one...
but its made up of glass panels...
the lift goes up, so too does ur skirt...
i tink i can camp beside the elevator and look up every time...
see singaporeans like to wear wat color...
so its safer to stand somewhere in the middle...
instead of the sides...
gers, u have been warned...
at least dover mrt is safe...
most of the newly built ones are really voyeur-inspired...

"be content wif wat u have - hong"

3:10 PM

January 21, 2004 COLOURED.


how time flies...
now i have oreadi finished my 3rd week...
though it seems like i have just begun work yesterday...
and chinese new year's looming...
actually oso not bad...
better than going back to school...
where time never move at all...
with another blink of an eye...
i tink it will be april when i finish my attachment...

the company has a lucky draw going around...
prizes are the XOs and some food stuff...
all taken from hampers one...
too bad i wasnt part of it...
it kinda suck when everyone happy happy go...
then i alone down there cannot take part...
i dun mind about not allowed to get anything...
but its the rubbing salt part that is pretty fucked...
no ang baos either...
and not even sure whether i can go to the company lunch or not...
maybe i shouldnt bother...
slacking is good for my health too...
why bother to be so eager to do things for them...
when they juz treat u like someone invisible...
i shall increase my stay at the toilet to 15 mins per trip!

i have come to the conclusion that im not a air-con person...
i have oreadi lost count of the number of times im ah-choo-ing at night...
having cold on almost every night...
air-con sucks, the reason why ppl get sick more easily...
breathing all the air that ppl exhaled over n over again...
inventor of aircon is juz as stupid as the inventor of undergarment...
impotence is what u get for trying to cover ur decency...
i really prefer the heat than the shivering cold...
i love hot hot, gives me the mentality that im hot...

when u're working, u can never go without ur earphones...
i am so glad that i didnt throw my old discman away...
so what if i didnt buy cds since duno when liao...
im juz happy that i managed to mute out the 38s...
why does that cheena tina takes the same company bus as me...
she craps the most, talks the loudest...
and insults others like nobody's business...
i supposed that comes wif her job eh...
customer service executive...
at least she can try to be like the other customer service executive...
serene is so much better...
blur blur cute look...
even the way she run when she was late oso cute cute pattern...
and the lips that r always on auto-pout mode...
how long can be a person go on being cute?
eternity for her case it seems...
i cant imagine anyone else being else when he/she oreadi 50 years old...
neber mind if she's the one who called me xiaodi...
almost everyone in the company didnt know my name...
save for the ones that kelvin always go out wif for lunch...
so they juz refer to me as xiaodi xiaodi...
or the one under hoay fern...
she is my network admin who i have to learn from...

so i watched cheena tina opening her mouth...
and not hearing her voice is simply paradise...
the music goes from my left ear thru and then to the right...
then from the right back to the left...
no, not the one ear in, one ear out pattern...
the music is flowing thru both the ears...
like its passing thru ur brains or sth...
loud soft loud soft...
from both the ears...
then climax from the brains...
that is trance for u...
trust those music makers to come up wif this kind of effect...
if i have better earphones who knows...
music will come from the front n back, top n bottom, left n right...
tats a real musical experience...
one of my friends is one who realli go for the sound quality...
every music sounds bad if u dun have a good sound system...
too bad im not one who has that enuf cash to splash around...
i rather buy new processor n ram and dvdrw drive...
and my 140gb combined now left with only 48gb onli...
without a single game installed too...
i realli wonder how i managed to survive witha 20gb in the past...

even though its sickening to hear her voice...
she said something meaningful on one of the days when my ears were unprotected...
shi ni de jiu shi ni de, bu shi ni de jiu bu shi ni de...
of cos she didnt said that out of the blue...
she has a story about her fren and a husband...
both are christians...
and the wife always scold the husband always go buy 4d...
the husband turn a deaf ear as expected...
then one day the wife have to go operation...
b4 she went in she told the hushand to buy some numbers for her...
and the husband told her siao ar, now tis situation still tell me buy 4d...
u should know wat happen in the end, it was top prize...

even though u oreadi know shi ni de jiu shi ni de concept...
sometimes u juz nd someone to remind that to u...
before something drastic happen and get depression...

raining in the evening these past few days...
and i never forget that rainy wednesday on my first week...
the bus driver veri notti one, never park in shelter area...
i was ready to run towards the company bus...
then like the tv story...
a big umbrella appeared over my head...
b4 i could even speak a word, she said "lets go"...
the 'she' was a spanish lady...
how i know she's spanish?
overheard all those 38 convos at the pantry area asking about how's her hometown...
anyway i was pretty embaressed...
its like a reversal of roles...
i play the shy guai guai yu nu...
and she play the knight in shining armor...
and im supposed to go "wah, hao mong huan ar"

and for the first time in my life...
someone actually called me fat...
my mother of cos, who else...
but i still look thin...
must be the size 31 waist that alarmed her...
can u imagine wat i will be wearing once i force myself to 70kg...
she said i will look like baluku liao...
whatever, my arms are still smaller than those of womens...

guys have arms smaller than the opposite sex...
no meat still wan to wear sleeveless to show ppl the tiny bicep to attract gers...
the ladies...
arms big n flabby still wan to wear sleeveless to attract guys...
okie, anomalic doesnt qualify for this, she's an exception...
oh pls oh pls, not another role reversal...
but it would be nicer if...
gers are the ones who have the tiny biceps...
and guys are the ones who have lardy n flappy arms...

the roles have changed...
soon it will be compulsory for gers to go for ns...
and guys will replace the SIA flight stewardess...
and porno movies will be centered on the guy and not the ger...
guys will laugh while covering their mouths...
gers will laugh out loudly so the whole world can c the pink gullet...

CNY is the biggest event instead of NYE or xmas...
u dun get half-day work for NYE or xmas...
and every single person is eager to go home early on CNY eve...
even the malays n the indians n the ang mohs...
NYE onli those ppl like to chiong are eager...
for some groping n some pinching...
oh, on my later post i will show u wat real celebration is...
fireworks in singapore cant be compare to those of malaysias...

"keep on trying on higher ground - hong"

10:29 PM

January 20, 2004 COLOURED.


I WILL NOT FALL IN LOVE
I WILL NOT FALL IN LOVE
I WILL NOT FALL IN LOVE

I MUST NOT FALL IN LOVE
I MUST NOT FALL IN LOVE
I MUST NOT FALL IN LOVE

I CANNOT FALL IN LOVE
I CANNOT FALL IN LOVE
I CANNOT FALL IN LOVE

se bu yi kong
kong bu yi se
se ji shi kong
kong ji shi se

*treats myself to some ECT*

"give it away now" - hong

9:39 PM

January 18, 2004 COLOURED.


**Warning
this is a test post...
if u hate slugs, leave this area immediately...




Baise Moi

6:42 PM


im sorry if u cant c the site without having to wait for minutes...
will be removing some pictures from the previous posts to enable faster loading...
and i dun wan to hear any complaints from that freak baby too...
u know when u make movies that ppl find it hard to understand...
ppl will either love it or hate it...
its a very thin fine line between excellence and failure...
some cheemo ppl c liao dun understand the movie...
then will think "wah so cheem, gd movie!"
to others, they will tink wat the fuck is this...
doesnt make sense and simply idiotic!

u know its juz like comparing pieces of art on an art gallery...
ppl can stand down there for hours looking at drawings...
trying to get into the artist's mind...
the emotions he/she was going thru...
when seriously i dun c anything coming out of it...
i can take water colors and juz splash them everywhere on the canvas...
put on art musuem and im paid shitloads of money...
why dun u try handing in pieces like these to ur pri sch or sec sch art teacher...
i wun be surprised if u fail the art class...

usually i c drawings like that type...
i will go "utter crap"...
so u expect me to do the same thing when i c those weirdo movies...
duno, movies seem to be different...
the more u dun get it, the more curious u become...
juz like crap literature...
u have to go a long long long long long long and winding road...
before u can say this is a nose...
btw, i always fail my literature...
the only time i passed it was when my teacher was on maternal leave...
and the relief teacher finally recognizes my talent...
writing in short sentences is the way to go...
i think she finds it refreshing that im the only one who write things short and sweet...
wtf u write so many lines n pages, waste paper and kill so many trees...
juz to become arty farty shakespeareman-like...
of cos that yr, my final score was 50.0...
moderated actually, its was 49. something...

my talent didnt go unnoticed when i enter poly...
ever written answers in point form during tests?
did that and score big time...
whenever i c edwin's papers i wan to laugh...
for sure his marks are always higher than me...
but u should have seen how much he wrote juz to get a lil bit of marks...

this post isnt supposed to be understanding anything...
this post is delicated to the foursome...

a tribute to BTHK

u prolly should have known wat bthk is...
if not, then maybe chicken rice gang rings a bell...
i only realised my existence when im one of them...
and i tink not much ppl care abt me in the past...
juz as much as i dun care abt ppl...

hmm lemme tink about that quote again...
sth which alexander deLarge said...

we are in a gang of 4, no more no less
otherwise there becomes a splinter in the gang

there u go, a foursome is perfect for anyone...
the four will cover each others backside...
why not go for two when i cover u, u cover me...
problem is how r u going to cover ur ass when both of u duno wat to do...
go get a threesome?
thats onli for sex...
threesomes is too troublesome, and the odd 1 will feel outcast...
thus the incredible foursome...

each specialises in their own forte...
and they oso have some sub abilities...
juz in case 1 is down, we can always have backup...

real life example #1

since i know bryant is reading this...
this is specially for u.. lol
being the leader he has the biggest responsibility...
not that he wanted it, juz that the other 3 of us are ball-less...
all the important things he will handle...
so we dun mind if we hand in shitwork...
since the lecturer is going to get him first...
he is the researcher...
and he can write pretty gd reports...

jc is pro researcher...
wan any info on anything juz find him...
got wat links gd, got wat lobangs gd...
he seems to know it all...
and his programming kicks ass as well...

toy is always the brain...
should have been a mensa member i believed...
juz that he's too lazy to do things at times...
otherwise his maths would be top of class...
heck he's not the number 1 standard in maths throughout his 4 yrs in sec sch for nth...
absorb things fast, understand concept fast...
and he was the one who came up wif that formula...
for the fyp thing so that things dun have to be done manually...
and the funny thing, he doesnt look like it...
i have always said he looks like an ah beng...
even though he keeps denying it...
juz the same as he says im gay...
and im denying it...

as for me, im their ass cleaners...
clean up after each and everyone of them...
not by choice though...
at that time i dun have fast connection...
so my role as researcher is automatically void...
and my programming is not that good compared to jc...
and my brain is a bit retarded compare to toy...
so usually im the last man to settle things...
u know like basketball there is something called the 6th player...
if the first 5 cant perform, then its the 6th who will clean up after him...
and im handled the things to do normally during the last day of submission...

yr 3 was a completely different story...
with jc in another class, its left wif us 3...
it did help that jonathan was in our group for a brief fling...
juz that one time cooperation resulted in distinction grade for the 4 of us...
u know u can never go wrong when the perfectionist starts to get serious...

real life example #2

ever wonder y singing groups always have around 4 members?
even though its juz two of them singing?
sometimes its juz one of them...
becos 4 is the magic number...
its bring fame to the groups...
juz look at speed...
we all know eriko n hiroko sure can sing...
and what r takako n hitoe doing in the background?
dancing along like erm... dancers...
juz stay as a dancer and dance for other groups then...
why would a group wan the same dancers everytime...

after they split, onli hiroko seems to be doing well...
but not really that well, even though her singing is better than eriko now...
wat do has-beens do when they're no longer popular and recognized...
they get back together of cos...

tink F4, okie i hate them...
but gers like them...
now split liao duno wat happen to some of them le...

5566, originally 5 member group...
got veri veri popular when one got injured and left wif 4...

now energy oso wan to follow the trend...
c the number of 4-person groups now?

the beauty of it is u cant seem to find fault at all...
each complements one another...

which explains the lost existence of the 3 jokers...
and the good old crazy days...
maybe we thought we were the 3 musketeers...
but the 3 musketeers was oreadi passe...
and takumi came a lil too late to make it official 4...
now each of us has our own path to go...
everything has changed...
it was not wat it used to be...
and even if we wan it to be, it wun be the same...
how long has it been since we were together...
i duno know honestly...

and not much chance of us being back together this year though...
2004 will be a very busy year...
and a year where we'll learn many things...
uchu will ord, sano n i will go in as recruits...
and takumi will still remain as a medic...

juz 18 days of 2004 has passed...
and so many things has oreadi happened...
hopefully this yr will be the yr of transition...
morphing process is starting slowly but surely...

"baise moi - hong"

6:29 PM


"I hate talking about how things are done. It's like a magic trick. As soon as people know how it was done, they say, 'Oh.' The curiosity instantly vanishes." David Lynch



10:54 AM


i never know what people meant by weird...
after watching eraserhead, i know what they are talking about...
even though i dun understand what this movie is all about...
after all its david lynch...
not everyone has a complex mind as him...
try figuring wif wat im going to show u...


looks cute aint it, the trouble started becos of it...
look at that, it even has its own fluffy pillow...
no wonder i hate kids...


EeEE the baby's sick, look at the pimples...
damn now its foaming at the mouth now...
so notti, blow bubbles at such a young age...
and u better stop using the colgate toothpaste...
too much foam and u'll die of bubblification...


awww, the father is worried...


see that steam...
steam helps to clear blocked nose...
and that a fact...
it helps to clear ur windpipe passage...
easier breathing and prevent coughing...


can i be ur mother???
PPPPLLLEEASE???
i'll be grateful to u forever...
im a gentle person...
CHIPMUNK CHEEKS!!! YIKES


jeez, even the worm is sick...
dun be so ER XIN pls, pretty pretty pls...


the tragic end of the worm who laugh at her...


YIKES, y the father head chopped off??
okie, ur head's quite round...
but wheres ur body?


oh there u are Mr Body...
u r the Body!


this is wat u get for going to gym too much...
big body, tiny head...
and this is i call a real DICKHEAD...
gers, dun believe wat others say...
dickheads arnt so big...
this is the most realistic thing i have ever seen...


and the hair fell off???
along wif the scalp...
i wun tell u wat happens next...
it doesnt appear in my photo montage as well...
u juz nd to know that the movie title has a big significance...


to have pimples is pure bliss!


yea, i feel so horny...
i wanna cut open its clothes and look at its naked body...
wooHoo~


NAKED!!!
wooo~
FIT KIA
stick n bones...


aint it a surprise that u cough out blood...
when i cut at ur heart...
and ur heart isnt bleeding at all..
and u bloody messed up the lovely pillow with ur stains...


okie ur heart is foaming...
what did i tell u abt colgate huh...
u have been brushing ur teeth behind my back...
c la, toothpaste overdose...
how u feel, refreshing?
come to tink of it...
it makess a good hotdog sandwich dun u tink...
looks like delicious toppings


okie, u wan to play hide n seek?
i got no time for ur idiotic plastic looking head...
u growing mumps or something?


dun u love this hairdo...
so yandao...
and look at the dust in the background...
must be ages since he last washed his hair...
this guy here is its father...
yea, the father...
he was no mutant i can assure u...
its his wife who has a problem...
its never the man's fault
he was too innocent...
that he lust after the woman next door...


for those who managed to read this far...
here's a proper line i've written...

watched battle royale 2 today...

okie, thats the line...
i reckon since ppl cant bother to double check that they have write in the correct fields in the shoutbox or not...
i might as well slack a bit in posts...
or maybe they love being screwed...
my number is always open u know...

"ive been lying on the floor for way too long - hong"

12:13 AM

January 16, 2004 COLOURED.



Refresh


10:29 PM

January 15, 2004 COLOURED.


juz one day after i thought i have gained enlightenment...
i was back to square one...
i had a dream yesterday...
about the same person...
and my motive is always the same...

i was never a dream person...
unlike most people who dream almost every night...
i only have them a few times in a year...
but all that changed when i started going for work...

last week, i experienced dreams 4 out of the 5 nights...
the dreams are not separate, they seem to be continuous...
always the same person, always the same weird feeling...
its like telling me what will happen in the future...
if thats the case, then good la...
but dreams are made winding thru our heads...

im given documentation stuff to do today...
i hate it, i hate the spreadsheets n the word documents...
whatever u type, the programs always try to act smart and edit for u...
thats windows for u, doing all the extra n useless crap...

today the company bus going home one bloody full...
a lot of ppl i never see b4 1 all board the bus...
like no more OT for them to make money liao...
and who else but her has to sit wif me...
the one wif tt to-die-for name...
as usual we didnt talk...
shes the guai guai type...
oso same as me shy shy...
so wat if shes in her late twenties early thirties...
not that attractive looking but not that ugly either...
theres something special about her...
if shes around my age or maybe older by 5 yrs...
i think she is the one...
too bad shes married n has a kid...

so far i have onli talked to 2 out of the approx 40 staff there...
but i guessed i have improved a bit...
given a choice, i wun tok to anyone of them...
and do u know i never return my network admin's greetings every morning...
everytime i walked past n heard a 'morning', i juz reply wif a soft 'huh'...
i am not them but i feel they tink of me as someone arrogant...
why else would i stay silent...
thats the sickest thing ppl like to believe...
always think that quiet quiet means arrogant...
fine by me, i wouldn't wan to entertain the 38 aunties...
i have oreadi heard what they said about the other person when she wasnt around...
about her seducing the manager wif her fat figure...
and i tink they're gossiping abt me during their lunchtime...
or mostly when i finish my attachment...

poly lecturers mentioned that guys talk more than gers...
thats becos sp lecturers are born blind...
this bloody course is made up of 90% males...
how much noise can 5% females generate...
btw the other 5% either went fucking or shopping...
try listening to the 38 aunties...
if theres one thing that i can change...
i wish all the 38 aunties stop talking...
best if they become mute...
they cant talk, but at least they still can moan...

and i finally know that how a company got its stupid JUICE motto...
they actually copied it from requiem for a dream...
one day i love to try that ECT...
zapping seems fun...

"dream dream dream dream dream dream - hong"

11:25 PM

January 14, 2004 COLOURED.


with the mind of a man in the middle
it could be the end of the world as we know it
still i never want it all, and i never want it now
i just want to cruise, if i loose then i'll figure it out
how the time flies, even with the blink of an eye
when you're young you absorb like a sponge in disguise
the you get a little older and gather your thoughts
it's amazing what you learn
when you've never been taught, ya know?

board a bus...
and u're facing a major problem...
u can't have double seats all by urself...
u must sit with another person...

life's a game of choice...

choice #1
choose to sit beside a fat malay kid...
with little space for urself...
fat thighs, small dick...
died of suffocation i suppose...
let ur little brother breathe la...

choice #2
choose to sit beside a petite n nice looking jc ger...
why are their skirts getting shorter and shorter...
im on long sleeves and i still feel cold...

u know that something must be wrong in my mind when i choose #1...
i let my subconscious decide and my physical form sat wif the fat malay kid...
when i sat down, my natural beast form regretted...

come to think of it...
i have always been doing it...
opposing what i realli love to do...
its for my own good so say the angelic me...
it depends on how u define good...
good can be bad, bad can be good...
unless someone screws wif the lawbook...
i will be #1 public enemy if i ever stop resisting...

but i did resist one thing and i am bloody proud of myself...
u know my it support administrator always goes to work wif the first 2 buttons unbuttoned...
and she was always bending and leaning at certain angles...
the pri sch version of me couldnt resist the drooling...
the sec sch version of me couldnt resist taking a peek...
now i tink im realli gay...
not a single hint of temptation at all...
maybe working is really tiring...
what's so tiring staring at a monitor screen i duno...
but i have been dozing off at the company's toilets...
it was done on purpose, or wat ppl call skiving...
anyway the toilets are pretty clean and no smell at all...
completely peaceful and free from the 38 aunties...

i've found another reason why being alone is better...
i hate to eat with my colleagues...
all eat so bloody fast...
i duno what are they rushing for...
u know that it is possible to go out and eat at 12:30 and return at 12:50?
inclusive of the 3 minute walk to coffeeshop and another 3 minutes walking back...
not forgetting the crazy queue on all the stalls...
sick people... lunch break is 1 hour!!!
argh, i swear i wun go out wif ppl who are fast eaters anymore...

how i wish i was working in central area...
not a single OL in sight at tuas...
i want to cry liao man...

its 14th jan right now...
13 days into the new year and i have sub-achieved 1 of the resolutions
i gained enlightenment yesterday...
human beings are so funny u know...
dun bother to understand them n u c the big picture...
which is exactly wat i did...
juz drop a few tell-tale signs...
and usually they confess everything...
interesting, simply interesting...

im giving my right wrist a week...
if i still feel pain, then my pes A is gone...
u know when u're alive and kicking, nobody give u things to do...

now my right wrist is wrecked...
and i have to change the refill for water cooler...
u know that big ice mountain...
luckily i got some experience wif it when i was working after my O's...
wrecked wrist tell me to bring laptop here laptop there...
disassemble pc, move monitors here n there...
once ur wrist feels fine, there's no more such tasks for u...
juz click clicks and that's it...

I am to blame, for everything
I like this game, that you all
make me play


"i duno hu to call a fren they all juz pretend to be - hong"

9:05 PM

January 13, 2004 COLOURED.


threw you the obvious and you flew
with it on your back, a name in your recollection,
thrown down among a million same.
difficult not to feel a little bit disappointed
and passed over
when i've looked right through
to see you naked and oblivious
and
you don't see me.but i threw you the obvious
just to see if there's more behind the eyes
of a fallen angel,
the eyes of a tragedy.
here i am expecting just a little bit
too much from the wounded.
but i see through it all
and see you.
so i threw you the obvious
to see what occurs behind the eyes of a fallen angel,
eyes of a tragedy.
oh well. apparently nothing.
you don't see me.
you don't see me at all.

9:18 AM

January 12, 2004 COLOURED.


watched a number of foreign films recently...
swimming pool, battle royale, ichi the killer, moonchild, city of god...
a lot of english movies but then im biased towards foreign languages...
and i learn something from thesse movies...
ALWAYS MAKE SURE THEY COME WIF SUBTITLES...

swimming pool and moonchild doesnt come wif subs...
at least moonchild doesnt nd any subs to know wats going on...
although u may nd some to understand wat cheena they muttering...
swimming pool veri jialat...
no subs dun understand a single thing...
all i c is boobs boobs and more boobs...
even the aunty oso go n bare her boobs...
and dun understand why the big boobs ger wan to kill someone...

"stop throwing tantrums, i love you - hong"

10:54 PM

January 11, 2004 COLOURED.


HASH(0x88d61e8)
Ghost or spirit: You are a lost soul. Very calm and
sweet, you are often the one who asks: What if?
With a clever mind, you want to explore the
world on a different level. Without the
answers, you aren't ready to move on. You are
most likely very creative and find yourself
thinking things through on a different level.
Where will you go when you die?

Morpheus
Morpheus


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??

10:06 PM


my right wrist is almost dead...
well, at least i can still feel the pain when i try to move it...
i oso duno what happen...
must be that darned cck gym bench...
think my right hand can be rendered useless now...
hope it gets better tml...

btw, anyone who had watched ichi the killer...
kindly gif ur definition of the ending...
the ending doesnt give clear answers...
and my mind is not so beautiful...

9:56 PM


their touchie-feelieness is an impulse they can't control and the thrill they get out of their crime is too great for them to stop.

these gropers are socially inept. usually shy and introverted, they are unable to carry themselves off well in social situations, especially where women are concerned.

they take advantage of certain settings like crowded placess and get a thrill out of molesting women who they would normally feel inadequate around under normal social circumstances.

as is often the case with sex crimes, seeing the victim in a state of utter helplessness is as much a motivation as the sexual satisfaction that gropers derive from their deviant act.


are u thinking what i am thinking???
i think im fully qualified to be a professional groper...
the groper's description fits me so perfectly...
like its custom made for me...
which explains why i stopped going for countdowns...

nobody goes to crowded areas to be packed like sardines...
the reason they go there is to grope and be groped...
whichever way, the grope count multipied whenever the clock strikes twelve...
u feel someone squeezing ur butt...
u think some hot chick is doing it and u felt so good...
prepare to kiss the lady and then u hear this husky voice...
"HAPPY NEW GAY YEAR"
fights are common during the new year not becos of gangs...
its becos of those sickos right there...
who cant tell the difference between straight n a bit curvy...

"their touchie-feelieness is an impulse they can't control and the thrill they get out of their crime is too great for them to stop."

ar yes, its the thrill...
i know how it feels like...
the adrenaline rush...
of cos i didnt go and grab everyone's boobs or asses...
but i reckon that thrill is the same when i took pirated cd from pasar malams...
doing a service for the public is what i prefer to call it...
i help to raid those pirates...

"as is often the case with sex crimes, seeing the victim in a state of utter helplessness is as much a motivation as the sexual satisfaction that gropers derive from their deviant act."

since i fall into the gropers category...
i guess i know what goes into their minds...
but i dun think its the helplessness that gives "us" satisfaction...
note the " " marks, im still innocent...
more likely, its the thrill of seeing that they like it as much as we do...

btw, the karen in ichi the killer rocks...
her cantonese, her english, her japanese...
sensual accent, i thought she was some ABC...
but guess wat, she's freaking singaporean!

3:22 PM

January 10, 2004 COLOURED.


i watched ichi the killer...
if i dun change soon, i'll end up like him...
serious, no joke, too much resemblance...

the phone is ringing but im not picking it up...
no one's supposed to be home now...
so it would be wrong of me to pick up the phone...

1:14 PM

January 09, 2004 COLOURED.


they mentioned that friday is casual friday...
nonetheless i wore my formal as usual...
not sure what does their casual mean...
naked like casual sex...
so i better play safe...
wait onli i wear my birthday suit there...

and for once, i had the looks of the big shot...
around the office, but not counting those rooms...
i didnt know that tshirts is oso counted as casual...
i thought a polo is the min. requirement...
anyway the guys all wore polos...
its the gers who wear tshirts...
no tank tops
no spaghettis
no tubes
no halters
no barebacks
no gstrings

why even bother having casual friday...
when u're not allowed to wear singlet...
miniskirts, hot pants, shorts...
slippers that made lots of noise...
combing of hair is too formal...
casual should be ppl who didnt brush...
who didnt wash their face...
still in their pyjamas...
with bad breath...
with stinky arm pits...
fart n burp freely without trying to hold back...
thats the real casual...

i am so happy when i got my hands on domino designer...
that book that i have been reading for 2 straight days...
nothing beats the real practice...

the primary role of the boss in this company is to eat...
my place is near the pantry area...
and i have oreadi lost count of the number of times...
he went in to have a bite, or to have some drinks...
and he looks like a bear...
walks like one, talks like one too...

the pantry is a horrible place to be in...
so what if they have cosmopolitan mags there...
the female stuff there all ji ji zha zha...
tok so loud and tok non stop...
i never venture there unless i nd to refill my bottle...

i tried very hard to find suicide club...
kazaa has it, but then too few users...
and i juz so happen to see the torrent file...
while i was finding more things to download...
i couldnt believe wat im seeing...
download speed is hovering around 150kb/s...
first time i ever c bittorrent can download so fast...
usually its veri low, 10, 20, 30 like that...
onli kazaa and flashget can shoot past the 100kb/s mark...
and the best thing is that i didnt upload a single shit up...
for those who dun understand how torrent work...
ur download speed is based by how much u upload...
most p2p programs are like that...
juz tt klite has this special code written so it tink u have upload a lot...
when of cos u are the same old leecher which every sharer loves to hate...
too bad no one is editing the torrent thing...
or maybe someone has oreadi done it...
juz that not too many knows about it...
oh ya, btw ichi the killer is complete 2...
and sth to note 2, i spoke too early...
accidentally close my torrent program...
and i lost my 150kb/s connection...

whenever i made promises...
u can be sure that i always deliver...
but right now i haben deliever 100% yet...
juz a minor glitch, duno y the moonchild download stop halfway...
lol, maybe its fated...

used up 60 gb so far...
no games downloaded except for cm...
actually i cant play games at all wif my lousy ram...
i saw this portable hard drive which my admin is using...
bloody small and bloody light...
its by anyrak, or anybak i forget...
its juz abt the size of a palm top...
can store 40gb...
i was tempted to bring it home and dun turn up for work liao...
its available in 20gb, 40gb, 60gb... juz that the price different
i duno about its latest liao, i think they got 80gb 2...
and the best thing is the device dun increase in size...
its still the same be it 20 or 40gb...

"u are only happy when u're wif me - hong"

9:37 PM

January 08, 2004 COLOURED.


its getting worse...
i actually overslept...
even though i slept 5 minutes earlier compare to the previous day...
i open my eyes c how come the sky no more dark dark liao...
haiz, feels like old days again...
the rush to sec sch juz so not to be late...
i have a proud record u know...
i was never late throughout my pri and sec sch life...
but i have a problem about punctuality during poly...

did i mentioned that i didnt brushed my teeth?
and since brushing of teeth is always the first thing i do in the morning...
u can pretty much forget about bathing, eating....
i dun even have time to use my hands to sweep my hair...
maybe gers like this kinda look...
imagine formal attire wif the stand-up-on-one-side-hair-due-to-sleep...
looks so cool aint it...

took the mrt instead of waiting for the bus...
buses are meant for couples...
the most romantic type of transport dun u tink...
lovers seat, pole dancing area, and five-some at the back...
travelling along a long and windy road...
its the perfect setting for any couples...
provided u can mute out the endless ringing of hps all over...

guess wat, i wasnt late...
and im too early for the company bus...
well of cos i panic when i woke up an hour late...
but to arrive at the destination at ard the same time as b4...
maybe u can try to figure wat i was doing for the extra hour...
when i woke up according to the alarm clock...

i think, im beginning to enjoy life now...
i dun curse anymore when she gives me tasks...
i juz take it as something to occupy my time...
it was total boringness the first 2 days...
i dun have internet access and i cant do anything...
now im given her username n pass...
the best thing is since she's a administrator...
i am allowed more freedom than the other users...
but being a good boy...
i didnt surf neopets while im working...
every site i go is totally related to work...
even though im very tempted to go blog sites...
and piss some ppl off in their shoutboxes...

why do ppl add shoutboxes to their site anyway...
all inviting ppl to have a go at them...
its like "WHAT ARE U WAITING FOR? COME ABUSE ME!"...
thats evidence that we are living the good life...
so much so that we dun mind a bit of abusing...

my fourth day at work...
i dun tink im doing much network things...
alot are more office like...
updating system got wat software...
prepare speed dial list...
creating templates...
arranging tables juz like flower arrangement...
the onli consistent network thing i have been doing is the tape backup...

but i have some things to keep myself occupied over the next few days...
once i install domino designer i can go create sites to amuse myself liao...

she gave me some network things to do...
but mostly becos they're so hard i dun bother to do it...
how the hell do u retrieve mail that has been deleted from the delete folder...
okay i know it is possible to retrieve...
but so far i onli heard of outlook express, and eudora that can be retrieved...
but lotus notes?
once its gone, its gone...
juz like ppl who dun appreciate my talents in the past...
when u want it back, solli, it never comes back to u...
it only visits to haunt u of the past...

piece of advice: fight the future and fuck the past

the email gone then gone loh...
anyway it was his stupid mind who go delete it wat...
so wat if he's the boss...
demanding that the email be retrieved...
i know wats in the contents la...
some porn pics he was trying to get rid of when his wife came for a visit...

im losing weight again...
no nd to weigh oso know...
juz by looking at the shape of my body...
eating noodles for 3 straight days...
i need rice pretty soon otherwise im dying...

juz happe nto be so suay that no one is going out for lunch today...
every single one at the office is busy...
im waiting for one of them to call me to go eat...
its 12:15 and still no answer...
its bad enuf that i didnt eat in the morning...
so i decided thats it and i went out by myself...

normally i dun eat cockles...
but i finished up my char kway teow wif no cockles lying around...
think i have to force myself to go back to the chicken thigh rice days...
last time add rice oso no problem, now duno why...
always no appetite since my cough...

wat makes it sickening is that my colleagues all eat like takumi...
i bloody hate fast eaters...
u know when they finished their food...
im still juz halfway through...
and having them stare at u like u're to blame...
its sick, 1 hour lunch break man...
make the most out of it, eat so fast for wat...
i wasnt kidding when u c my nick changed to hongeat during evening time...
u will notice that it takes a long time for the nick to be changed...

almost everyone is raving about chiobus in their companies...
or in other companies when they come for a site visit...
and they all love lunchtime...
becos they can see OLs all over the place...
EXCEPT ME...

i spent my lunchtime looking at workers from the warehouse...
thats how bad the situation is at tuas...
sure the gers are there...
but, they're not gd enuf to even match the warehouse workers...
so fit and fat and dark...
whichever way, i cant tell from their overalls they're wearing...

maybe its a blessing in disguise...
meant to prepare me for ns life in 6 months time...

ppl hate rich ppl becos they know they cant compete wif them

[21:30] he is a fucker
[21:30] always chee hong gers

i cant believe i actually PM straight in his face
lol, it was meant for etoiles 1..
but since i done it, i tink i kinda love it...
and to think he actually so smart...

[21:36] hey
[21:36] wat?
[21:36] i am a fucker that always cheehong girls
[21:36] I know
[21:36] u noe
[21:36] u noe shit la
[21:36] u noe what people tell u

but i dun tink he's that smart after all...

[21:40] ya
[21:40] just pissed off at hongy
[21:40] din noe he this kind of ppl

if u didnt know, u must be living in the stone age...
and did i mention that i hate ppl who duno how to type my nick properly...
to do it once is forgiveable...
to repeat it again and again is obviously itching for a fight...

so there he is...
thinking im going around badmouthing him...
maybe he'll be badmouthing me in future...
lol, i dun care la, i got no time for him...
i need my 10 hours sleep...

[21:52] u say to etoiles i am a fucker tt always cheehong girls ar
[21:52] lol
[21:52] not u la
[21:52] another channel 1
[21:54] say really leh
[21:55] bluff u for wat
[21:55] got prize meh
[21:55] okok
[21:55] nvm

okay i lied... everyone lies dun they...

Moral of the Day: to lie is human

System of a Down - Johnny

anyway he bought my shit...
lol, which is kinda surprising...
so here's a song for him...

Hello, my name is Johnny
Well hello my name is Johnny
I would like to explain myself
And I would like to complain in vein

Sweet little boy
JOHNNY!
Sweet Little Boy
JOHNNY!
Let me show you the way to my
Let me show you the way to my
Let me help you explain your mind
When I help you explain your mind

'ello my name is Roger
Well hello my name is roger
I would like to proclaim myself
A god
And likely ordain myself

Sweet little boy
ROGER!
Sweet little boy
ROGER!

Let me show you the way to my
Let me show you the way to my
Let me help you explain your mind
When I help you explain your mind

Let me show you the way to my
Let me show you the way to my
let me help you explain your mind
When I help you explain your mind

Sweet little boy
Johnny
Sweet little boy
Know as roger

"love is all that i can give to u, dun bother asking me for money - hong"

10:16 PM

January 07, 2004 COLOURED.


i dun get it...
always nodding off in the mornings...
even though i slept a good 7 hours...
last time was 5 to 6...
looks like im back to the old me again...
the 10hours slp to be truly alive...

i had a dream yesterday... of her...
they say ppl dream more when they work...
how true, my head keeps jerking on n off...
with my right hand fixed on the mouse...
and staring at the monitor with close eyes...
i cant believe im actually doing this at work...
i guess thats wat most ppl do when they have nth to do...
nth to do? go n do sth, DREAM!

not that im not given tasks to do...
there are tasks, but its quite hard to finish them...
not say easy, not say hard, and not so medium either...
confusing? its hard to explain la...
maybe a nice example will be like love...
u duno when its coming...
and before u know it, u have found it...
something like that...

easier tasks that i've been given seem quite hard for me...
i onli know how to photostat using those old models...
juz place the page put down, copy, change page, copy...
office types 1 no have laoya patterns 1...
can put 1 whole stack of data...
set it to be 1 sided or 2 sided...
and juz copy...
no need flip here flip there...
maybe im a mountain tortoise...
but they should introduce this sort of machines to schools...
why use those lousy machines, still must flip flip everytime...

oso my first time on trying out binding...
the very first time i did it...
i oreadi committed the "don't" error...
luckily i managed to salvage the situation...

i am on accelerated learning...
circumstances forced me to do it...
wat to do, my sissy-voice supervisor is forever busy...
he onli talks to me during lunchtime...
and the IT support adminstrator is a female...
i dun tok to gers i have known for years...
and now i have to tok to 1 whom i have met for 3 days...
accelerating faster than the speed of light...

and she didnt know my phobia...
shit, got me to call dell company up...
seriously i dun tink the person on the line understands wat i want...
i was desperately trying to explain wat im calling for...
finally when i mentioned quotation then she knew wat i wanted...
i hate phones...
come to think of it, i hate real time thinking...
who knows maybe i have down syndrome since birth...
tink im a bit retarded when pressed for a response...
no wonder i rock so much on irc...

initially i was hoping i dun get to do much...
then i can slack the whole way through...
now i hope they give me some things to pass my time...
i dun wan to get scolding from the nodding offs...
and im truly impressed at the way how my administrator handles situations...
nothing seems to stop her from achieving her goal...
and nothing ever gets her down...
she tells me to find something over the net to search for info...
i always give her a blank answer...
but she always got everything ready b4 the day ends...
and problems users encountered is juz no big deal for her...
if me, i would pee in my pants liao if i cant explain to user wat is wrong...

some ppl are blessed wif nice names...
TAN AH KOW, LIM AH BENG, TAN AH HUAY...
CCC, HHHHHHH, QQ...
but none can be as beautiful as this SHEAU SHYAN...
at first look it seems like a guy's name...
but actually its a ger's name la...
first time i heard someone calling that name...
i fell in love wif the name, not the person...
i was wondering why didnt anyone think of this name b4...
and to tink that i thought no name can be compared to zhu-er...

the owner of that name is the system specialist...
whom im supposed to work with...
but so far im still wif the support admin...
sooner or later my sissy boy will start to nag at her to teach me things liao...
but for tml, i have free gym session again...
have to move tables and chairs for duno wat conference...

and one thing, blogunion site will be revamped...
u know that something is wrong...
when one of the contributors is so scared of viewing that site...

"would u laugh if i said all along it was u - hong"

10:04 PM

January 06, 2004 COLOURED.


first day at work was pretty boring...
nearly late becos my uncle got the timing wrong...
the boss cant be bothered wif me...
my supervisor speaks like a girl...
and 2 females are in charge of me...

i hate the morning...
seems like no one is giving me tasks to do...
spent my morning try hard not to fall asleep...
and i was given a lotus notes client manual to read...

lunch? wat lunch...
u cant tell them u're hungry...
becos they eat together...
either juz a short walk...
or they go somewhere else by car...
so im stuck wif my sissy sounding supervisor...
no matter where i go, no matter wat i do...

finally started doing things in the afternoon...
im beginning to feel that im more like an office boy...
making copies of documents...
organizing the files into folders...
how come they fax so many things...
and never all never keep properly 1...
it was backdated to september...

i dun have a place for myself yet...
like a nomad, moving from place to place...
and the tables all neber clear 1...
junk here junk there...
my supervisor promised me a better table tml...

i think i have to thank the ppl there...
as usual i wasnt asking questions...
even though im a bit lost...
lucky they keep reminding me this n that...
duno how to get home...
duno wat company bus...
duno drop off points...
duno pick up points...

got off at lot 1...
and i duno tml wat time the bus come...
once again the damsel in distress was rescued again...
by who else but the hero...
ppl yin xiong jiu mei...
my case is mei nu jiu baichi...
i was all ready to say thanks...
when she called me xiaodi...
thats when i held my breath b4 i start to utter the letter t...

today was more fun...
i had no idea whether the bus arrived or not...
i forgot the person's face yesterday who helped me...
i dun remember faces who called me xiaodi anyway...
then i saw thsi small bus...
different from the one i took yesterday...
and this female is waving at me...
oh, i remember now, that xiaodi-calling person...

i got a nice place with 3 tables all to myself...
happy happy position my computer at my new place...
and then i was told to move again...
back to the old dump place where i was left alone yesterday...
and i have to carry back the pc over there...
they tink its funny to make wasted trips carrying stupid things...
maybe they understand that i need to carry some weights to maintain my strenth...
how thoughtful of them...

they think young ppl have brains that absorb as fast as a sponge...
currently my brains is full of neopets...
insufficient disk space to take in work info...
today they mentioned a lot of things..
and i think i forgot them all...

p.s. i will write better once i get used to my new boring life...

"wat is it that u're so afraid of - hong"

10:35 PM

January 04, 2004 COLOURED.


the darned tractors below...
i duno why are they coming to dump soil on the field...
dump it silently and stop farting that gas all over...
its noisy and its smelly too...

not exactly having a good time at my uncle's house...
i ate breakfast at 11...
and now im having lunch at 12?
so i was sitting down there struggling to finish up my food...
though the helping wasnt that much, the breakfast usually last me for 4 - 5 hours...

and we left pretty soon after...
my sister wans to meet her bf...
my dad wans to go to the racecourse...
me? nowhere to go but home...

inside the lift my dad was chatting to this couple...

"wah ur son so big sized, very soon will overtake u liao"

(fyi, my dad was at least 82kg)

"so how old is he, 15?"

FUCK

last year i had ppl saying i look like 16...
one year on and i look like 15 ?!?!
my looks are getting younger with age...
give me 13 more years when im 33...
ppl will say i have a babyface...
the gers sure envy me...

once i rectified the fact that im 19...
he changed his tune pretty soon...

"huh, then like that must eat more leh, too short liao"

FUCK TO U

who is he calling thin...
he must have seen too much beer bellies geezers...
so much that he cant differentiate between thin, fit and fat...

who cares abt height...
u wan so tall for wat...
i dun wan to c heads of dandruff everyday...
i prefer to see faces thank u very much...
juz imagine u're twice as tall as ur gf...
either u become the hunchback of singapore...
or she'll become the stiffest neck of singapore...

and i always get this satisfaction from beating guys taller than me...
be it swimming or running, or any other sports...
guess i have to thank them for my motivation...
them? can go home and cry in their mummy's arms...

and my plans of wearing something veri lok cock for work tml backfires...
almost all of my frens are wearing formal...
shit, i was preparing for jeans and a torn tshirt...
while my formal clothes' sizes all are screwed up...
first day? prepare to give them a bad impression of me...
watch this space for some incidents thats bound to happen...

"i think u know wat i am thinking, but im afraid to ask - hong"

11:27 PM


looking thru blogs i realised something...
theres quite a numer of ppl out there who go out by themselves...
alone and without company...
whether be it delibrate or unintentional...

some do it for the freedom they get...
wun be bugged around by someone who wants to go somewhere else...
while u still wan to stay at that LAN shop or comic shop or bra shop or watever...
its hard to find someone who share the same interests as you do...
and its quite uncomfortable when u c ur fren keep hinting...
obviously desperate to get out of that place while u're loving it...
thats loner example 1 for u...

some do it becos well, they dun have a choice...
they dun like to go out alone...
its usually their frens who put them aeroplane...
or their frens got their bf/gfs...
and they dun give a fuck about u...
tok about brotherhood and sisterhood...
its time to enter monkhood and nunhood...
otherwise they prefer to go out wif cooler frens...
they dun wan to be associated with a bunch of losers n geeks...
they want to be been among the hip and fucky (oops)
its funky people who dun know how to fuck ya...
all in all, they find all sorts of excuses not to go out wif u...
this group of loners yearn for acceptance...

finally the hybrid loners...
a bit of the both combinations above...
they like to be alone yet they wan some company...
sounds contradicting?
thats me alright...
but i guess there are some who belongs to the hybrid group as well...
i think the most intriguing part is u are out in the city...
and u dun have any plans as to where to go...
so u juz wander around...
stopping by when u see something interesting...
theres no need to bother about the time at all...
u can stay there for hours...
u juz dun know wat time u will get home...
becos its a totally random event...
seeking surprises to light up life a little...
yet they wish someone was there with them...
although i dun tink anyone shares the same patience as the hybrid group...

sheesh, maybe we should form a loners club or sth...
the numbers are growing and ever increasing...
but i guess the formation of the club is not for some outings...
that defeats the purpose of the meaning of loneliness..
im juz curious to see how many are realli going solo...

oh juz in case u realised what is really happening...
my posts are getting longer n longer...
thats becos i have time on my time right now :D
no neopets to bother me...
well, i still play them sometimes juz to get the freebies...
now im on a 3-movies-a-day timetable...
but come monday it will be a different story of cos...
but we'll see, work...
i hope i can influence them to blog as well...
at least that gives me an insight of the company as well as some hankypanky...
although that is highly unlikely...
as i expected to get a rather cold reception on my first day...
and some scoldings and blaming and all the toks of responsibility...
and of cos the old ah peks...
and some guys who think they're the king of the world...
who thinks interns are fun to bully...
its nice to think bad of them in the first place...
becos on the actual day, u feel more happy...
reverse psychology at its best...
dun understand me? never mind...
i guess no one does anyway...
it takes a lifetime to figure out wat goes inside a beautiful mind...
i guess i should stop here now...
written 2 post for 1 day...
im quite worried that i wun have much to write for tml...
hope for some incidents and accidents at my uncle's house...
going there tml to eat...

"TELFAST D TABLET take 1 tab/s at bedtime- hong"

2:01 AM


i hate to say that horoscopes are accurate...
i never believed in them...
yet they always like to prove me wrong...

are the characteristics of humans realli written on the stars?
cant they be cultivated thru the way that we are brought up...
or izzit that the surroundings that we live in are juz destined...

if we cant change the way that we used to be...
then i guessed we're behaving juz like pawns to some big shot...
think matrix...

it seems that theres no point in making things happen...
becos wat will happen will happen...
no matter how much u try to avert, it will still be there...
the ending is pretty much the same...

maybe thats the reason why i believe in destiny...
if i dun go find it, it will come and find me by itself...
stop pursuing, there's no point going after it...

anyway i began 2004 on a sick note...
i was coughing again...
and i went to see the doctor today...
i dun wan anything to go wrong once i start work...
all the hawker food is definitely going to piss me off...
unless my cough problem is solved...
otherwise my weight will be free-falling...

i think my cough problem is unique...
most cough related problems relate to lousy lungs...
and to all the doctors i have seen so far...
they all said there was nothing wrong wif my lungs...
as healthy n as strong as ever...

thats explains why the normal cough mixtures dun work on me...
thats for ppl who have coughs due to cold, flus n bla bla...

the onli problem lies in my windpipe...
inflammation yet again...
and he mentioned i have this slight sensitive nose...

anyway i was more interested in his stethoscope...
i was so wanting to get that high feeling...
but his stethoscope felt a bit weird...
it wasnt cold at all...
it was warm...
like kena soaked in some warm water previously...
SIAN

he gave me new cough mixture...
its dark pink...
like those jelly flavored type...
n that inflammation tabs...
and something new...
this ultra big tab to be taken at bedtime...
hmm extra large viagra?
or some wet-dream inducing drug...
i'll take a pic for u next time...
my camera's eating up the batteries life real fast...
wats so great about a tablet u say?
wait til i show u exactly how big it is...
the mac daddy of all pills man...

Everybody thinks you're well
Everybody thinks I'm ill
Watching me fall apart
Falling under your spell

But you're fooling yourself
You're fooling yourself

"everybody does it, juz that no one talks about it - hong"

1:41 AM

January 03, 2004 COLOURED.


they told me to get out of my house...
they told me to breathe some fresh air...
i saw the sun in the morning...
and theres only one place on my mind...

arr... those gers in woodlands swimming pool are so horny...
their eyes wandering whenever they spot any guy on sight...
and they're wearing lesser and lesser by the day...
one day i wun be surprised to see gers without their tops at all...
maybe thats one thing guys will agree with for equality...

cant blame the gers...
pick anyone of the guys in woodlands...
and he'll beat all the contestants at the sentosa countdown thing...
yea sentosa, theh ultimate haven for lamers...
hunks? kiss my ass...
back to woodlands, the guys all well built and big sized...
im look like small kid if i stand next to them...

no goggles, so sian...
swim 10 laps then my eyes sting like shit...
so i lay down on that laoya plastic white chair...
thinking about things...
i always think about stuff when im swimming...
i think i fell asleep for a while...
u close ur eyes...
u can feel the sun...
u hear water splashing...
u hear sounds of laughter...
u can even imagine theres actually sand ard u...
like u're in some paradise...

neopets is draining me...
the short drift felt like eternity...
but paradise has a even nicer surprise for me...
and the next thing i knew...
BoA was there lying on top of me!

crazy, if i ever open my eyes...
i will be cyclops of x-men...
the sun was well... nice and warm...
i felt like the winner of the Are You Hot contest...
i am so damn hot...
even my body feels it...

2003 is a year of lessons...
learn a lot of them in 2003...
maybe thats y im a bit different now...

ever heard about life being the worst teacher?
it gives u tests before teaching u lessons...
so, its really okay if u fail life's tests...
after all, u're not prepared...
and u didnt do the ten year series...

sometimes things are not what they seem to be...
it takes more than a naked eye to figure out...
maybe a naked body will reveal more answers faster...

each and everyone of us has our own ideal situation...
and most of the times there will be stumbling blocks along the way...
smart ppl will conquer them without a problem...
and nothing seems to stop them on their way...
unless u bribe them wif some chocolates or anything they indulge on...

but not all are smart loh...
not all = referring to me...
when things dun go their way, they're stumped...
it onli happened to me once in 2003...
but that was enuf to change the man...

never felt so devastated or low before...
actually i can salvage the situation...
but the classic pessimist didnt do a single thing...
maybe i was too shocked by wat happened to even react...

test #1 report card : FAIL

i have been thinking...
what if everything is going to plan...
is there a nice ending?
or will it be stuck at some place and end in tragedy...
maybe its better to stay like this or stay like that...
so many maybes...
no one knows unless you give it a shot...

ever since that day, i have neber taken things for granted...
life is a bad teacher as well as a sadist...
it likes to play bad tricks on u...
you dun even know wat hit u and the whole game plan is lost...

maybe thats y i dun think about the ending anymore...
it is the process thats more important to me...
after all it lasts much longer than the ending...
why suffer throughout juz to get a happy ending...
i rather have fun throughout and have a very very bad ending...
and maybe have a nice ending as well...
and its the u-cant-see ending that makes the process more interesting...
humans are aroused by the mysterious aura that surrounds it...
thats y guys get more hot when gers r in their lingerie than without...
take out liao no more mystery liao will sian diao...
but that is inside my ultimate seduction guide...
so erm... change topic...

u know i always hate ppl...
ppl who do so many things to please the one he/she loves...
and the he/she usually dun bat an eyelid or notice them at all...
i was wondering if the he/she isnt interested in them...
why bother going thru all the trouble...
not worth it and a big waste of time...
i think they're pathetic fools...

BUT

i guess they cant be blamed...
they know they wun be accepted...
yet they still harbour this tiny tiny hope...
that he/she will be touched...
they are searching for the perfect ending...
and i tink everyone does...

its like i love A but A is waiting for B while B wants C badly...
u know, this very big chain thats neverending...
its better to be loved than to love...
since pri sch, this line has always been in my head...
too bad ppl dun practise wat they preach...

test #2 report card : FAIL

it happened once and i swear it wun happen again...

while u do things for ppl wif no apparent reason...
subconsiously u're doing it for something else...
u know that something is wrong wif u...
yet u juz cant control it...

thats life...
playing tricks to amuse itself...

and advice for the pathetic fools...
stop dreaming, becos the end is nearer than it seems...
and dun tink about love so much...
and all the bullshit about i was born to be wif u bla bla...

i dun see y being single can be so dreadful...
some couples wish they can go back to being single...
so that no one complains about his/her lifestyle...
all the bad habits, all the curfews...

anyway, life's more than juz love...
so enjoY dudes

"the significance, dun give me the wrong idea - hong"

12:05 AM

RULES

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