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October 31, 2003 COLOURED.
went on a video spree today...
spent 3 hours online getting 20 videos...
thank goodness some servers were fast during noontime...
normally i have to wait quite long to complete 1...
i should be learning drums...
or guitars, bass, turntables, keyboards...
maybe i can try my hand in growling as well...
but i did none of them...
ppl into rock normally have bands of their own...
me listen as a rock fan and juz a rock band wannabe only...
having seen a number of rock videos...
i roughly have an idea how...
to groom urself to become a huge rock star!
#1 rock star essentials
- hair
- preferably dreadlocks
- bald is nice 2
- lil bit of hair here n there (balding in short)
- unkempt hair
- beatles hair always score hits
- no afro hair ard pls
- gelled up hair longer than 10cm
- normal length strictly unacceptable
- face
- no makeup
- tons of white powder
- burning red lips
- excessive pouting
- facial hair scores tremendously
- piercings on eyebrows
- piercings on lower lip
- CMI faces can always use masks
- masks must be scary
- pikachu n facial masks auto reject
- body
- stick thin
- plump
- 6ft min height (for lead)
- below 1.7m max
- anything ard 1.7m to 1.8m cant qualify
- acceptable BMI means disqualification
- tattoos
- piercings
- clothes
- black
- undersized clothes (rare)
- jumpsuits
- shirt n tie
- fish nets
- oversized t-shirts
- nude is eligible
- bright colors acceptable
- PINK IS NOT!
- physical abilities
- able to jump
- smashing guitars
- love to fly
- able to swallow mike
- know basics of ping pong
- elastic fingers
- drink urine
- swallow roaches
- power neck muscles
- loves vomiting
- face gets red easily
- suck women's toes
- kiss guys (FAGGOT!)
- rubber faces
- masturbate live on tv
- point middle fingers professionally
dreadlocks is quite an essential seriously...
without them, u lost ur ability to head bang...
n if u cant produce headbanging music...
then u might as well be a britney spears fan...
beatles hair is oso quite in...
esp. bands in europe...
their videos look so retro...
i thought they were produced in the 80s...
but they get u qutie far alright...
tink the strokes, the hives, the white stripes...
oasis, lots n lots more...
botak is oso in...
the very MAN look...
even nicer if they have a menacing face...
ppl wouldnt dare rejecting their albums...
all look like straight out of prison like that...
juz released from murder or anything to do wid violence...
the balding part is reserved specially for radiohead...
onli weird ppl can be exceptions...
grow taller by 10cm is quite a good idea by static-x...
but wayne is oreadi tall enuf...
and quite waste of money n time to make long hair stand...
remember u're not a star yet...
if u're shy or have hideous features...
masks are nice...
and they're popular...
slipknot, mudvayne, blue man group...
provided u can breathe well in them...
slipknot did it to get the high feeling due to lack of air...
or u can go ard molesting ur fans...
since they cant recognize ur face anyway...
no makeup is really required...
but if u wan to be uber popular...
then its a must...
as white as possible...
as white as snow white...
add a bit of lipstick...
best if draw wrongly...
like marilyn manson n his enlarged red lips...
or if u wan to be like brody (the distillers) oso can...
but it onli applies to gers...
no sights of beards or goatees or moustache put u in a bad position...
unkempt is the key...
and it usually means u must look rugged...
remember heck-care looks always score...
rock stars can n only be stick thin or plump...
acceptable weight is abnormal...
either they spent all their money on good food...
or too busy makin love wif siliconed-enhaced women to eat...
or spent all on crack n alcohol n fags...
tattoos show u are tough n mean...
but no hello kitty or i love mummy tattoos pls...
even marilyn manson would be scared of u...
dress code for all rockers: smart formal...
quite a lot wear suits...
but jumpsuits look cool 2...
esp those can zipped up to cover the whole neck...
exceptions like fred (limpbizkit) xtra wear tshirt onli...
nude is quite common as well...
u can always have the gers screaming at ur body...
when there are no muscles no watever...
juz bones or beer bellies...
and gers.. like them????
no wonder all the fit fit guys all turned gay...
its neber easy to be in a band...
ur jumping must be veri good...
for the thinners can try 3 storeys...
for plump can try 1 storey...
yesh... POD guitarist n bassist can jump to 1 storey high...
if their video is to be believed...
AFI guitarist n bassist can do it even better...
3 storeys n hanging in mid air...
unless u're rich, DUN smash ur guitars...
its a real waste...
and u may hurt urself in the process if u're not careful...
wif all the splinters flying ard...
u can always master the art of smashing sometime later eh...
love to fly means moshing...
u have to trust the fans below...
otherwise when u throw urself in the air
n no one's there to catch u...
if they catch good loh...
but ppl will be groping everywhere...
even guys (FAGGOT!)
and lose some clothing here n there...
juz make sure u dun have a knife stuck at ur back...
learn to handle the mike well...
most hold the mike so clos they have no problems swallowing it...
wat does ping pong has got to do wif rock aniway...
nothing really...
but POD beat team china in a ping pong competition...
and that is realli something...
ping pong [POD - BOOM]
elastic fingers [KORN - DID MY TIME]
swallow roaches [PAPA ROACH - BETWEEN ANGELS AND INSECTS]
suck womens toes [MARILYN MANSON - THIS IS THE NEW SHIT]
interested juz download the videos n u get wat i mean...
sucking toes i m interested...
wonder how it taste like...
i tried suckin my own when i was young...
didnt try it again when i grow up...
u must have neck muscles to growl...
to screech, to scream...
juz abt anything that is considered noise...
but music to the rock fan's ears...
give it up for jimmy urine (MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE)
he urines, he drinks it and he kisses ppl after that...
and guys wanna kiss him 2...
enuf said, i wouldnt wan to be near him...
masturbating at the crowd may be common at some concerts...
but live on tv?
slipknot did exactly that on late night wif conan o'brien
of cos its fake...
the pinochio mask man was doing it on his long nose...
middle fingers must be fleshy enuf...
mine canot make it...
thin n long...
and i cant point it straight...
tink thats abt the minimum requirements...
im sure there are still lots to add to the list...
but thats all i can tink abt for the moment...
doesnt really necessary mean u must have all the requirements to be a rock star...
impossible for 1 to have long hair n be bald at the same time rite...
so long as u have met a requirement for each feature...
then u're quite safe...
after that its juz left to ur talents n attitude...
it will go a long way to super stardom...
juz remember to name me in ur to-thank list
if u have taken my advice...
and become the next big band...
and win lots of rewards...
if u dun, try not to remember me eh...
cos i dun wan to be responsible for any failures...
i have a reputation to protect...
100% success rate is wat it says on my CV...
i wrote too much liao...
this rock topic supposed to be a short 1...
but i got too carried away and crap more nonsense into it...
i have more serious stuff to say...
but not now, next time...
i still haben give my statistical review of my site yet...
saw my site counter stats and spot some interesting info...
will be telling more over next few days...
death of one is a tragedy
death of millions is juz a statistic
"the end has no end" - hong
1:32 PM
October 30, 2003 COLOURED.
Pale angel go away
Come again some other day
The devil has my ear today
I'll never hear of what you say
Promised I would find a little solace
And some piece of mind
Whatever just as long as I don't feel so
Desperate and Ravenous
I'm so weak and powerless over you
2:39 PM
October 27, 2003 COLOURED.
lanjiao ppl always give u lanjiao work
ppl wif lanjiao shit-looking hair always give u lanjiao work
ppl wif lanjiao attitude always give u lanjiao work
get this straight in ur brains...
and if u duno hokkien then dun act like u're some kinda pro...
sia mi 'bo cham' 'bo cham'...
its damn BO CHAP la...
who r u to call us 'bo cham' when u give this kinda lanjiao report...
okay, maybe toy doesnt care but i do...
do u even consider this a report when its juz screenshots...
heck even my ancestors can come back from the dead and do it...
and damn that lecturer too...
for giving such a hard project...
though he was kind in extending deadline to monday...
i still stick by my motto...
"if u duno how to do, no matter how much time u have, u juz cant finish it"
sian manz...
thought of giving him some work to do...
ended up i have to cover his ass...
duno how many times have i cover bthk's asses liao...
i'll neber forget that time where i stay up whole night to finish up everything...
its doesnt pay to be hardworking...
it pays to be xialan...
and it pays to be playing ard...
since u have the goody-two-shoes ppl like me covering...
i think its time to change...
time to be the bad guy...
but its too late...
no more projects anymore...
juz exams and exams...
now then i know hamsters are nocturnal creatures...
my sister juz bought 1 recently...
they are so lively at night...
run on the wheel like veri fun like that...
run so fast n so long...
they could have broken the records for any race liao...
and all too often they juz spin out of control...
and are sent flying...
gave a rather crap presentation of the program...
we only know how it works 1 hour b4 that...
and bryant was busy printing screenshots...
at least he's doing something...
lecturer commented abt us how to pass like that...
honestly the program was a good 1...
too bad we dun know how it works...
so we cant market chiobu's work well...
anyway the lecturer keeps a copy of the program for marking...
my brain is suffering from months of inactivity...
i cant get things in my head now...
think later have to read more...
otherwise my results sure veri jialat...
"bu xiang bei ze yi fu hei se de ci pang" - hong
11:59 PM
my father has been hit by the durian craze...
he bought durians from the uncle living on 15th floor...
and the uncle told him that they were taken from somewhere...
on that faithful night, the inevitable happened...
my father went on a trip wif him to get durians...
he didnt come back until 6 in the morning...
he brought back 2 gunny sacks full of durians...
sickening, paradise for most, hell for me...
gave away quite a lot but still too much to handle...
ended up having durian kueh for breakfast...
luckily there was still some bread...
otherwise i would have starved...
ever since that incident...
he was all hyped up...
juz bought a new torchlight to add to his equipment...
and got some relatives to get in the act as well...
durians suck, gimme chicken anytime...
i am not serious in my studies again...
since i will be quite busy tml...
i reckon i wun have enuf time to study for tuesday's exam...
thought i will do a bit of read up today...
ended up playing games and cant stop...
n i cant get over the fact that i have lost weight...
thumb n middle finger can cover the wrist liao...
the medicine seems to be working well...
seems to, cos im safer at home...
see how i will fare tml in school...
whenever its vibrating, it starts to get itchy...
but not the same as last time...
a bit better...
of cos it better work...
this antibiotic is poison...
"wat u wan is inside" - hong
12:04 AM
October 26, 2003 COLOURED.
i know its been a long time since i've updated the blog...
i did write something...
juz that i no time to go publish...
actually its juz a plain excuse for being lazy...
below are some excerpts i have wrote over the days...
so most of it doesn't make much sense at all...
yesterday was quite hectic...
not becos i was celebrating my bdae...
but doing some last minute stuff for the report...
we made the lecturer wait for 15 minutes...
and had quite a lousy presentation to show as well...
supposed to hand in the report b4hand...
ended up handing it in 3 hours after the presentation is over...
the bad thing about downloading albums b4 it was even released...
was that the lyrics were different...
lol, i juz found out when i was going thru sevendust's songs...
lyrics on the official site and the songs i have are different...
those leaked songs are after all still incomplete...
normally they juz need a lil bit of touch-up b4 it hit the stores...
but overall the music is the same, juz that some words are different only...
financial test was quite free frag...
there's no motivation to do the test at all...
how to chiong when u juz realized u have scored 90 for the previous assignment...
like toy, he loves to calculate how much effort is needed to pass...
even if this test i get 5/100 i will still be able to pass...
jimmy has burned new anime for me...
getbackers, recommended by my frens...
once i managed to get cable then i tink i will download anime liao...
not forgetting all the rock vidz...
but currently the situation doesnt look good...
there's no reply from SGI yet(HENG ar)
the lecturer is looking for ppl who is competent in html n asp database...
bthk has replied to the mail without delay...
i mean that is perhaps the most easiest of stuff to do...
since we have some experience in it...
who the hell wan to work in unix environment dealing wif all the servers...
see how, maybe its fated that i have to learn new things...
learn new stuff is a good sign...
but the fear of being familiar wif it is there...
come wat may...
maybe i suggest setting up a gigolo network...
not only can i clear my ITP...
the money will pay well i reckon...
so many tai-tais in sg are so lonely...
thursday was a bore...
went to school expecting some scoldings and got none...
cos the software project we didnt do anything...
no report, the program chiobu can't complete...
fucking thing was only toy n i was present...
toy wasn't supposed to come at all...
he said he need the presentation marks to pass...
bryant? overslept and didnt come...
ass got the cheek to ask how's the report...
lecturer gave a last deadline on monday...
guessed we were real lucky...
which allows us to slack again...
chiong cs with toy n chiobu...
as usual i was at the bottom ranks...
and those kids are realli pro...
wear sch u so blatant the auntie oso let them play...
started to write my part for fyp report...
all the stupid alignments, fonts...
neber standardize then juz throw at me...
waste time editing sia...
boost up to 50 pages inclusive of appendices and contents...
bryant called again...
the greeting i get from him nowadays is "hows the report"
y cant he say sth like "boa visited ur blog"
of cos i didnt do anything for the software report...
i dun know how to and i dun wan to do it...
have to let them do things...
otherwise they everytime so free then im busy with stuff...
saturday morning...
my mother is forcing me to drink the veggie juice again...
she has been drinking it ever since the doctor indicated that she has high cholesterol...
you wan to drink then drink mah...
dun pull others to the waters as well...
the taste's not that bad really...
but i hate to be woken up at 8am everyday...
no thanks to that juice-maker...
my mother was surprised when i said im going to the doctor today...
its so unlike me...
normally i wait until ppl nag then i go...
but this time is different...
i am sick of coughing...
i spent 1/3 of the year coughing...
i dun wan to spend 6 months continuous jerking up n down...
doctor looked at me and said "i hope u're not seeing me for ur cough problems again"...
take a look at my medical history...
down with fever around once a year...
recently its cough cough cough...
he did that usual and weird procedure of listening to heartbeats...
checked my throat and stated its red n swollen...
prescribe new antibiotics -- ofloxacin to me
he oso did some marketing...
saying that these pills sell more expensive outside...
and no one can match his rate that he is offering me...
mentioned something about $30 but my medical fee was $28...
wif a additional bottle of cough syrup...
off to school with the intention of doing some blog reading...
got bored soon...
why is nobody updating their blogs...
the government must pass a law...
that states blogging daily is mandatory...
those breaking the rules will be punished severely...
write for goodness sake, WRITE...
no wonder blogger sometimes lagging...
cos too many ppl create blogs but neber update for ages...
they should do some account locking like hotmail like that...
make the service harder, better, faster, stronger man...
to the lab that was touted by jonathan as the free printing lab...
no doubt i was curious about it...
imagine wat those honest ppl used up how much money on their cash cards to print stuff...
i saw junia n chiobu there...
and they were printing notes which was my main purpose there...
after they taught me that printing bug i went about doing my job...
i printed...
all on color printing...
ayz, when its free, better make good use of it...
leave the black n white printer to the ppl paying for it...
i tink its the only lab where the paper from the color printer runs out faster than the black n white one...
in the end waste my time sia...
took the paper tray from the black n white n load it to the color 1 to resume printing...
so mah fun loh...
the thickness of the notes is quite obscene...
2 modules onli leh...
and the paper that i got is as thick as pure physics n pure chemistry books combined...
nevertheless, i cant complain...
its real value for money -- oops -- its FOC...
next i tried to find some boa sites...
hoping to print gigantic pictures of her and then laminating it...
but i cant find nice pictures, only printed 1 in the end...
went on researching for palm reading...
i am getting really fascinated wif it now...
the lines are there for a reason...
and how the fingers are shaped oso tells a person's personality...
too bad i onli got a brief...
when i have more time, i will start from the basics...
all i know right now is im looking for one who has short fingers...
or anyone whose last finger is exactly like mine...
long and thin, deviates from the rest of the fingers...
others need not apply...
"i wish i can die right now"
a familiar phrase for most people...
wat the heck is their aim anyway...
to gain sympathy from others?
wanting ppl to console them?
when will adults ever grow up...
when it comes to D-Day...
guess who wans to live now...
be glad that u r still alive...
cos u regret it when the time comes...
u tink its so fun to die meh...
u will cause ur family to go bankrupt manz...
funeral so expensive, coffin now oso got brand 1...
if no money then they bo bian put inside black garbage bag...
and down to the rubbish chute liao...
"perhaps" - hong
1:29 AM
October 25, 2003 COLOURED.
palm reading? try this flash to see wat age are u suitable for marriage!
http://game.qd.sd.cn/game/update/20011127101916.swf
11:43 AM
I know that it never goes away
All I feel, everything I'm not today
So I try and I try to make everything right
I don't feel like I'm doing it, it affects me
You wouldn't listen even if I told you
Who the fuck am I to say?
You're too busy with the lies they sold you
Another cure to fix your day
Open wide for all the shit they feed you
While the TV defecates
And blindly walk wherever they will lead you
While the edges slowly fray
I know that everything can change
What I need is to open up again
So never again will I look back in vain
'Cause today's not the past
I don't need to relive it
Are you satisfied?
I've given all i can
And are you pacified
Or do you want more from me
I've learned that this life's not just a game
Just a line between the pleasures and the pain
i would be flattered if u tink i wrote the above stuff...
11:32 AM
October 20, 2003 COLOURED.
[Deftones - Be Quiet And Drive]
the song which most rock fans has...
i like them wheenver their songs are featured on OST...
but i actually deleted their hexagram album...
cos its noise to me... ;P
SCV should show MTV2...
not that idiotic MTV Asia...
if got MTV2 then shiok man...
all the rock videos...
no pop vidz at all!!!
quote of the day: "gentlemen, goodnite... ladies, good morning"
ever since that day...
the damn beer has brought my cough back...
which gives me more reason to hate it...
on the eve of such an important day...
i couldnt get to sleep...
and i actually dreamt of senzi...
everything seems so real...
we were alone for a while n spoke little...
then i duno how uchu managed to get into my dream...
next thing i knew was its time to prepare for that interview...
some memories juz cant seem to fade away...
if i say week 14 is the make or break week, i'll take back my word...
week 15 is a killer...
usually meant to spent more time at home than in school...
all becos of that interview, lab test, 2 reports, 1 program, 1 demostration...
and not forgeting that financial exam on wednesday as well...
i can only think about relaxing after thursday...
and thursday is of cos the last day of school...
watever...
monday is over, left 3 more days...
wats 3 more days compared to 4 months...
i will get thru it...
most prolly wif lots of cheating included...
reports i can always get ideas from here n there n call it my own...
actually i dun like stealing other groups' reports...
not that i have integrity...
juz that their reports suck...
its true, and i think the lecturers will agree deep inside their asses 2...
not that im being mean...
but wat can u say when they hand in a 40-page report compared to our 10-page 1...
i wun be surprised if both groups are given the same marks...
the most the 40-page 1 will get a lil lil bit more than us...
after all the reports we write in poly no need to be so detailed...
juz the important points and we score...
heck theres no need to follow the report format at all...
they always love to put one whole chunk of rubbish...
which the lecturer has problems pinpointing where the main focus is...
lecturers should love me...
for writing short n precise reports...
its the same thing for exams...
some of my frens quite dulan when they write so many...
and i write 1 word only yet both answers are correct...
its juz a simple way...
why cant people use their brains...
maybe they used their brains too much...
i know i like ppl who are sophisticated...
but too sophisticated is real DUMB...
"i wish u to be happy n nothing else" - hong
11:09 PM
taxis are so dumb...
impossible to find 1 in yew tee...
rushed to take mrt to clementi...
and one long line of cabs waiting at the taxi stand...
how stupid can they get?
if i blur blur wait at yew tee i think i confirm late...
science park realli kan ulu...
there is a bus...
SBS 92...
but i dun see any bus coming around from anywhere...
there is a shuttle bus though...
not sure where it goes...
anyway i was early enuf to take a dump in the toilet...
stomachache since this whole morning....
reached the 3rd floor of the damn Rutherford...
door says PUSH...
i did push ...
but it didnt move...
damn those security doors...
i look around trying to find a way in...
maybe they will arrive at 10 sharp i thought...
then i saw the doorbell that looks more like a switch...
press liao then the ppl inside keep asking: looking for?
finally i was let in...
damn those retards...
i was standing at the reception...
no one was at the counter...
5 minutes gone and im still standing down there waiting for people to serve the lord...
finally that kenneth came...
another guy along him is lionel who is losing his hair....
interview was juz about the same as the communication skills for work mock interview ...
i felt kinda out of place...
didnt bring my resume at all...
n i took off my earring before hand as well...
but the other 5 studs are still intact...
juz in case they wanna get rough wif me...
strong points, weak points...
they were grilling me like veri fun like tat...
sometimes u juz have to play around wif them...
smile smile...
wait til i kill u, stupid ass...
anyway he was assessing me...
and he was right about 1 thing manz...
i did have poor man-management skills...
but wats the use...
if selected, im not going to take his place....
i m an intern...
not someone who can boss over all the staff to massage my whole body...
made a grave mistake by not fielding questions...
shit i 4get to ask how they choose their candidates...
but judging their expressions...
i tink they juz abt random pick ppl from the database...
interview was half hour long...
and he wished me luck for the later lab test...
yea rite... if i wasnt selected then its realli a waste of my time...
even if im selected, i tink i will hate it...
realli burns pockets...
take cab take cab...
and they were all in shirt n pants...
watever...
leave it to fate...
im more than happy to work in sp...
juz that the money sucks big time...
11:18 AM
October 19, 2003 COLOURED.
REMEMBER 18 OCT
its bloody more significant than 5 OCT...
experience all the sour sweet bitter hot tastes of life in juz 1 day...
that is 18 OCT...
i have only 1 thing on my mind that day...
to find that silicon graphics location...
i thought it was a piece of cake...
as long as u have legs, u will find it...
i even brought a compass along for easy navigation...
unluckily the compass sucks, the needle is very lagging...
free gift from SAF 1, no wonder SAF personnel mati...
cos they cant even get their compass rite...
alighted at commonwealth and juz walked south-east...
then i realized wat streetdirectory.com indicates can be so deceiving...
its says 1.75km direct from the mrt to the building...
direct means a straight line...
doesnt include any obstacles...
its juz like me asking u to walk from gombak to cck mrt...
the distance is damn short...
but getting there by foot means a super long detour...
same for this rutherford building n commonwealth mrt...
first obstacle was a railway track...
fences were put up...
there is a minidoor somewhere...
but the other end is the railway is the forest...
walked past one whole neighbourhood trying to find a way past the other side...
i ended up walking towards east n near queenstown mrt...
i knew that i was in the wrong direction when i reached queensway shopping...
anyway i have to see AYE somewhere to get to rutherford...
and i learnt many things about the expressway...
that it is damn long...
it has many parts...
the more i follow the weirder it gets...
soon i reached bukit merah...
way off my original location...
call off the search and next destination: nearest mrt...
once i find cpmb it was easy to walk...
the route was way too familiar...
redhill mrt is easy to spot after all...
one thing i notice about commonwealth queensways area...
the flats are old...
those kind which ur grandparents most likely live in since 1970s...
where there is no finishing for the floor at all...
and the windows are those glass panes...
and wooden doors...
many places of worship!
indian temple n christian church side by side...
then later at queenstown got another indian temple n chinese temple together...
not bad eh, i thought singaporeans are racists...
damn those condos 2...
basket have to walk 1 big round to get to another place...
cannot cut thru for shortcut 1...
went to esplanade to catch some live action of soccer...
my first time there...
and i got problems finding colors at the bay (at or by, cant remember)
took the escalator out and saw the waters...
the sight was something...
something very unsingaporean...
i feel like i was a tourist instead of a local for a while...
found the colors thing...
shit have to eat at there then can watch...
toured esplanade for a while...
very brief...
cos i had no idea how to get to mrt...
and im lost inside the building...
rushed to chinese garden n to my more familiar kopitiam territory...
i tink i regret moving out of jurong west...
there got so many coffeeshops...
and they actually have SCV installed...
how good can it get when u have access to 3 coffeeshops within a minute's walk...
and 2 of them have SCV!!!
yew tee region have around 5 kopitiams...
within a 1km radius...
and none of them have SCV...
its always interesting to watch soccer in kopitiams
ppl sharing ur table are placing bets over the phone with bookies...
a football newbie come n watch will learn all the bookie terms in record time...
u have ppl cursing all over...
and i can always look at gers with their bfs when im bored...
the thought of u doing something with her right in front of the bf can be so...
must be quite a very shiok feeling, HIGH HIGH HIGH...
nasty, im nasty...
but of cos those are juz funny thoughts when u have nothing to do...
and one uncle treat me free beer...
i let him share table then he offer to buy me drinks...
at first he wanted to get me another glass of lemon barley which i've had liao...
then he oreadi ordered beer for his group of frens...
and he suggested i join them for drinking...
i kept refusing but he insisted...
quote of the day: "NEVER MIND LAH, MOST IMPORTANT IS LONG ZHONG HAPPY AR!"
that was exactly wat he said...
and he told the beer auntie to go get another glass...
and so i was there drinking seriously for the first time...
when i was young i onli took sips from my dad b4 i go eeeYucKz...
beer sucks, wine sucks...
neber liked them, won't like them now still...
he got 4 bottles of heineken beer for the 5 of us...
and that beer lady...
aunties become ladies when ppl gets a bit tipsy...
keep refilling my glass...
sian, duno how much i drink liao...
but at least for the first time...
ppl believe im over 18...
i lied to him when he asked if i have ever drink b4...
told him i only did it during CNYs...
if i tell him i neber drink at all then he wun believe...
juz like i tell the ppl that boa n i are together...
wun believe loh...
to remain at the kopitiam u must meet some requirements...
understand hokkien is a must...
everyone communicate in hokkien...
even that uncle who treat me oso talk to me in hokkien...
but later he ask me...
when i keep answering him in chinese...
i wasnt born to learn hokkien okay, but i understand the language...
hmmm, i have upgraded...
from a auntie killer to uncle killer...
what more can i kill?
after the match i went direct to jurong east mrt...
i thought i will be able to catch the train...
but hell no...
the train was still there when i arrived...
but when i wanted to get past the gantry, the train is departing...
and the officer as usual say n0 more...
SMRT realli sucks...
didnt want to walk at all...
oreadi walked a mini this afternoon liao...
flagged down a cab...
and wat i did for 3 hours the other day can be achieved with 15 mins by car...
but the price is rather...
soon my pockets will be full of holes...
check the company location yet again...
dun tink it is possible to walk from any mrt station at all...
looks like i have to do it the anomalic way...
actually its more of the gers' way...
the problem of having the company located in such a "nice" location...
is that u have to be rich...
cos its onli accessible by car...
i reckon all the staff drives eh...
unless they have some company transport...
lab test haben prepare...
report duno wat to write...
i oso duno why m i so worried abt the interview...
more like a waste of time n money...
watever, juz get it done n over with...
haben even study for my financial test on wednesday...
the way i deal with things has always been seen as a hack-care attitude...
considering how others would have done them differently...
its no surprise why i have few friends...
i dun realli cherish them...
yet im a extreme loyalist...
juz that most of the time they didnt know...
or they know but i juz pretend pretend...
surely i deserve a better hiearchical status than the rest...
but when u're grouped among the same as those punks...
wat can u do...
loyalty doesnt pay...
then its my decision to be loyal...
they didnt demand from me...
anyway im keeping records...
this year is the turning point of my life...
so many things have happened...
oreadi started on my 31st December entry...
usually the longest entry of the year...
check out the previous year entry to verify...
but i reckon 2004 is the year when i will really change to a completely different person...
provided things turn out as expected...
but im still keeping my options open...
not telling wat they are...
all i know is 2004 will affect my life for perhaps the next 10 years...
"stop faking for the public, lets do it for REAL" - hong
4:33 PM
October 17, 2003 COLOURED.
SGI....
Silicon Graphics...
offices at 39 locations worldwide...
kena have to go interview...
shit, im going to piss on my pants now...
wats bad was i replied to the mail...
and addressed the person as MR LIM...
the reply came back and with a HIGHLIGHTED MS LIM...
not a nice way to start off...
most prolly i'll be bumped out within a minute of the interview on monday...
12:41 PM
October 16, 2003 COLOURED.
2 different worlds...
thats what we are...
why must humans be so sophisticated...
although i cant deny that cheem ppl attract me...
juz as they are attracted to my simpleness...
"that person is the richest when he has the cheapest pleasures"
its irritating when people are pestering you...
its even more irritating when there's no one to bother you...
even though you are right there in their faces...
even though you are not transparent...
they treat you like you're some non-existant piece of shit...
what do they take you for...
someone who only exist when they need your help?
some kind of last resort eh...
one day i promise...
they will regret...
a tofu for a tofu...
whenever tv shows ppl who have successfully slim down...
im not interested in how they do it...
more curious about how do they gain weight in such a short time...
so while others are taking down useful tips on how to lose weight...
im looking for the gain 20kg in 6 months tips...
can you separate
separate me from the sand
is it not too late
to try and start again
can you separate
all the darkness from my eyes
i cant see under the water...
me googles are fogged...
me hair too long...
danger danger keep clear...
swim little bit then stop liao...
its hard to swim many laps when ur googles are fogged...
woodlands is better than chinese garden in many ways...
its cheap...
more muscular men...
realii alot leh...
compared to me ar...
i tink my figure more suited for supermodel, minus the leg hair...
must psycho ownself to eat more liao...
the water is not salty...
all of them tanned until like black pigs...
the gers can swim many laps!
i got home and guess wat...
my sister said a company called while i was away...
im supposed to get back to them...
i dunoo...
not calling them yet...
i got phobia of calling strangers...
actually its not so scary wat...
but then, i juz dun dare to call...
duno watever company who call themselves SGI...
singapore gays institue?
anyway im not calling them...
if they interested then most prolly they will call again...
most likely they will select other candidates though...
watever, they were wrong to call in the afternoon...
i should be in school you know...
juz that i so happened to be going swimming n skipping lessons...
can't really blame them anyway...
the only way to contact me was my home...
and email...
but email most likely i juz delete unless the subject is sth special...
after all ben affleck, j lo, and other stars tried writing to me...
and they all ended up in the trash without opening the mail at all...
lecturer said something about the not guaranteed jobs for everyone...
those without jobs most prolly end up in SP doing some nice work...
and getting paid $8 per day, not hour...
im more comfortable with SP but that means i dun have enuf to settle some bills...
esp when im going to get hp n cable in december...
attached to other companies is the better way to get more money...
since i turned it down liao, juz leave to fate...
if i happen to pick the call, then im going...
else i will juz ignore...
"when i m gone, say hello for me" - hong
11:12 PM
October 14, 2003 COLOURED.
zui ai ni de ren shi wo
ni ze me she de wo nan guo
zai wo zui xu yao ni de shi hou
ni mei suo ni ju hua jiu zou
saw an advert the other day and i tink i m suffering from depression...
insomnia...
loss of appetite...
stress...
temperamental...
suffer setback...
but i think thats wat most gers go thru...
loss of appetite = dieting for them...
as i said the week before, monday is crunchtime...
the day that makes the difference between a repeat year and a nice break...
2 presentations, 3 reports, 4 lecturers, 1 demostration, 1 logbook...
as usual have to wear formal...
i always look lam nua when i wear formal...
becos the shirt n pants are not my size at all...
first up is the fyp presentation...
cock up the first time when i try my program...
b4 the presentation i oreadi tested it liao can work leh...
turns out that the serial cable too loose, so the device cannot receive...
my presentation sucks as usual...
i didnt come prepared for all the presentations today anyway...
last night was busy writing the 6 months worth of progress reports...
the only time when i excel in presentation was for that report writing one...
that was when BTHK started...
and thats when i finally belong to a group...
end of presentation...
lecturer came to see us after the co-examiner left...
all he said was "beautiful, nice, very good"...
toy managed to peek at the co-examiner's marking...
he said all 3 of us were given 8 8 8 8 8 8...
8 out of wat?
if 10 then happi la
if 15 then still okie
if 20 then LIKE THAT HOW TO PASS...
the co-examiner seems to be impressed by bryant n toy's speech...
mine? watever...
but im not too worried...
bryant's part theoretically was to write the receive part...
as expected, we cant get it to work at all...
practically, everything in Visual C++ is done by me. PERIOD...
yea, i wrote that reading part for him...
actually he understand wat my code says...
becos he has done his research, juz that he didnt come out wif a program...
for toy, he know nuts about visual c++...
cos he juz cant bother to go find out...
anyway anyway...
i dun care abt who gets more credit...
as long as i can see a PASS for FYP when i get my results slip i happi liao...
wireless presentation was a lousy affair...
i duno where the lecturer was looking at...
looking everywhere but not at the screen and us...
among the groups, ours was the most simplest powerpoint...
done by your truly...
i neber believed in lengthy slides...
we only have 11 slides while others have double or triple that...
the best thing is i only get to present for 1 slide only...
and i finished my presentation in less than 1 minute too...
somemore that question i didnt do...
i did none of the questions anyway...
i was in charge of the powerpoint slides and report...
challenge 2 demo...
dun understand wat the ACL indicate...
lucky the lecturer juz go around clicking things by himself...
its bad...
its so unlike me these days...
i cant eat proper meals...
have to skip my lunch in order to finish my dinner...
i realli duno wat caused this...
maybe im beginning to get sick of SP food...
and my eyes are wandering...
always prefer men's bodies than womens' in the past...
always like to compare compare and then must aim to be better than them...
now prefer to look at gers liao...
not sure how much weight i have lost as well...
need to do a lot of cardio excerises to get me eating normally again...
lost the hunger...
lost the anger...
lost the bite...
im spent...
i actually went to taka wif bryant n toy on saturday to watch teens model search...
yikes, teens from 14 onwards...
something is realli wrong wif me...
not that we wanted to look at them...
bryant n i were more interested in Jamie Teo as one of the stars...
i remember her as the onli female that is worthy to win that competition...
and the first celebrity whom i have written an email to...
how does it feel to write a mail to someone is singapore universe 2001?
i stopped writing after a while...
sometime she replies the messages...
but usually after some weeks later...
it must be quite sick to reply the same thing over n over to every single fan...
spotted more stars there as well...
andrew seow, nick shen, randall, tianyang, xiaoxin (very fat)...
jamie, yvonne, deborah sim, michelle liow, le yao...
deborah sim, michelle liow, le yao are totally unrecognizable...
maybe we were standing too far to have a clear view...
le yao juz doesnt seem like le yao...
first up was the cheerleaders...
3 guys threw a ger up...
one guy obviously no strength as she wasnt thrown straight up...
she was way out of postion...
so then the guys were lagging...
never see where she is falling...
and we hear this loud thud...
landed hard on her buttocks from the height of about 1 storey...
amazing thing is she still can stand up by herself...
and continuing the routine...
bravo, most gers will stay there n cry like baby liao...
then the competition and the contestants...
which brings back the memories...
why i hate those contests...
the supermodel, ms world, ms universe...
duno how they pick up ppl from the streets and call them beautiful...
thats why singapore neber wins any of the international contest...
a smart woman can go n be ms singapore n bimbos always fail...
too bad international judges like bimbos...
and all men too...
beauty is skin deep...
not wats underneath...
no one wants to know wats underneath anyway...
ppl onli consider character after hanging out wif them for some time...
first impressions its always skin deep...
SKIN DEEP
get that in ur head...
deemed ugly initially...
but will be labelled as cute overtime...
back to the competition...
F8 n M9 caught my eye...
i tink F8 will win the competition easily juz by the first dance intro...
she has wat the judges always look for : X FACTOR
one who knows how to flirt with the camera...
or wat those sports illustrated photographers termed it: make love to the camera...
once u joined the contest, u juz have to be confident...
and go strut ur stuff...
most were juz walking quite fast...
too nervous or juz to make up the numbers...
M9 was out of place wif all the teens...
he was oreadi 20...
and its obvious he goes to gym regularly...
the rest of the guys were all skinny and bones...
like that how to lose...
flipping thru some magazines when i saw a familiar name pop up...
'specially designed for barons strong brew by gail chen'
everyone associates barons with bikinis...
after all they were the ones who intro the bikini party...
didnt realise that her designs are used by the models...
she's someone i know from irc some time ago...
mentioned sth abt being a designer and stuff...
now oreadi duno where is she liao...
sometimes u juz neber know...
the next person u chat wif might end up being a minister...
or the most notorious criminal...
this week has been quite relaxing...
after monday is gone, suddenly it feels like holidays...
like i said to bryant n toy...
i can finally afford to fall sick...
and hopefully gain my appetite back...
those 2 lazy pigs are at home duno doing wat...
i juz went to school today to ensure my attendance doesn't fall below average...
and also to do thw wireless quiz online...
4 out of 10...
my first quiz i onli got 3 out of 10...
i suck at quizzes...
it feels good to get the fyp presentation done early than the rest of the groups...
suddenly i seem to have more friends than normal...
all kneeling down worshipping me...
hoping for some golden words of advice from me...
i made that up about the kneeling down...
but its true ppl have been asking me abt the preparation liao...
i would love to dispense some tips...
at $50 a pop...
it helps that bryant n toy were absent today...
which means i m the sole survivor...
but i feel for chicken...
his lecturer is worse than ours...
he told them to meet him yesterday and he didnt turn up...
today same thing and he put aeroplane again...
chicken oreadi dulan liao...
bring his laptop to school twice for nothing...
actually he should be in our group...
too bad the group allocation max 3 members...
initially i fear abt the situation when we have to axe 1 of us...
bryant n toy are bound to stick together...
so its between me n chicken...
chicken is more pro in many aspects than me...
but lucky i was chosen...
and jimmy managed to recruit chicken...
maybe thats juz life...
the capable like toy dun wan to do work...
the lousy like me is forced to read up n becoem capable...
actually i tink i should be the leader instead of bryant...
for all the things i have done, but i rather not...
i excel when im a follower, but i suck when i have to lead...
experience says it all...
npcc i was excellent in a squad...
but once the seniors appoint me as sec 2 trainer, its downhill from there...
i have very lousy man-management...
and i prefer to be controlled than to control...
ooh i feels so like a xiao nan ren...
but nvm la, gers nowadays so domineering...
ys did a little palm reading on me today...
he said i will lead a better life if i was born a ger...
wat was he trying to get at huh...
maybe my hands look too feminine to be like a man...
he oso said i will marry at an early age...
around 20 to 30...
if its true then good for me...
if im still single after 30 then its juz life...
always interested in palm reading...
wanted to read up in the past but then too lazy...
tink after my exams i will camp at borders liao...
then read everything about fortune telling...
its a good excuse to hold a lday's hands too!
"if i could feel again, will u tell me now or wait til i wake up?" - hong
11:17 PM
October 11, 2003 COLOURED.
one helluva song!
Ill Nino - How Can I Live
I am so alike you
In so many ways
I know I�m just a copy
That carries on the strain
But, we make the same mistakes
�Cause, we are one and the same
We leave behind the stain
That will never separate
All the lies in me
All that dies in me
How can I live without you?
All that lies in me
All that dies in me
How can I live without you?
I am your mirror image
I�m all you left behind
You made me what I am
But who the hell am I?
But, we make the same mistakes
�Cause, we are one and the same
We leave behind the stain
That will never separate
All the lies in me
All that dies in me
How can I live without you?
All that lies in me
All that dies in me
How can I live without you?
We�ve made the same mistakes
We are one and the same
How can I live
Do you think of me?
Do you dream of me?
I always dream about you
Do you think of me?
Do you dream of me?
I always dream about you
1:32 AM
October 10, 2003 COLOURED.
Which OS are You?
8:02 PM
quote of the day: Polish Yourself; Crush The Others
as usual i cant get my java programming test to work...
same as the other 16 students...
onli 4 managed to complete it...
my tutorial lecturer was surprised by our honesty...
his class apparently had over 90% workable programs...
and thats becos the answers had been leaked out...
but anyway, quite confident i can pass this test...
if he marks the same way as he did for the first test...
the next 3 days will be stress stress and more stress...
altogether we need to finish a report by this week...
another report by monday...
3 presentations on monday...
and that BIG fyp draft report by monday...
financial management report to be handed up on friday...
i haben do anything yet...
i was left with the last part which is worth onli a nice 5 points...
yea, 5 points for summarizing the whole report...
when i haben even look at wat my other group members have done...
its okie, we are used to last-minute things...
i can do the 5 marks summarization on the deadline itself...
oh i forgot, i did the cover page as well...
that itself is a important contribution...
wireless mini project i oso no need to do any questions...
my job is juz write the whole report and create a powerpoint presentation as well...
thank goodness bryant did his questions early...
then i can start working on the report a bit rather than chiong during the weekend...
do u know the last time i touched powerpoint was when i was in pri6...
so alot of the things i all forget liao...
duno how to add textbox, add title, edit the things...
in the end i have to contend wif ready made templates...
hacking have to show the challenge #2 to the lecturer...
i have to go read up on the accesslists...
cos im not involved during the whole process at all...
kudos to toy...
he realli should be in mensa...
fyp is the most worrying thing...
it sucks, why do we have to present on monday...
like that means we have less time to do...
but i oreadi some sort of give up on the last part liao...
i oso have no idea how to go about writing my part for report...
no way we can get a high grade if we cant do the last part...
juz hope that its juz sufficient to warrant a pass...
i dun mind scraping thru...
ever since i got 25 for tt stupid wireless lab test...
otherwise most subjects im confident of maintaining As n Bs...
jimmy burned some episodes of Ikkitousen for me...
sometimes i realli duno wat to do wif anime...
the more u see the more u get hooked to it...
ultimately it depends on the storyline...
i liked those which are funny...
be it lame, slapstick, crude, or dirty jokes...
and there must oso be some action...
which is why i like Pokemon...
Ikkitousen is all abt fighting n challenging others...
becos of the magmatamas they inherited from past warriors...
nice anime, too bad kids central cant show...
cos there's too many upskirts...
the lead character is female, so wat to do...
"the tough onli gets softer with some TLC" - hong
2:05 PM
October 09, 2003 COLOURED.
missed wireless tutorial cos i was watching jacky last night...
they were showing the singapore version...
which makes me feel so unsingaporean...
they feature many places which i last visited during the stone age...
singapore zoo? last visit: primary school
sentosa? last visit: primary school
high class restaurant: not even once
st nicholas: dun know where is it
esplanade: haben even walked around b4
they should show more heartland stuff...
like that if all the tourists come n expect the same things as the show then how...
n they should go n eat at coffeeshops...
those restaurants food sucks...
waste money n not worth it at all...
most of the good food are in coffeeshops after all...
entered MLT2 n the very next thing i did was to leave it...
jimmy said ys brought his ball and on his way to school...
toy n bryant didnt come today which is a pity...
anyway i oso duno why i go school...
juz go for the sake of going...
my fyp lecturer sucks man...
die die wan us to find out by ourselves...
dun wan to help us at all...
he tink like that can spur us on meh...
being able to work on 2 parts without his help is oreadi veri good liao...
the bloody last part...
i tried so many programs to try to capture the received data...
all the evaluation programs, all the free source... all failed miserably...
n becos of that, i doubt that it is possible to receive anything at all...
duno wats the problem wif him oso...
other groups last day on wednesday...
he die die wan us to present on monday...
juz to accomodate him ar?
dun mind, as long as he give us some codes, which he didnt at all...
he oso told us to come back on saturday to try n finish up...
he tink we lazy izzit...
onli go school then got do...
he duno how many hours i have spent at home trying to figure out...
no matter how much time they allow is neber enough...
when u're stuck, u juz stuck...
theres no way u can get out...
unless there is some model answer...
he kept saying its possible to receive data...
but i prefer to see it wif my own eyes...
now my financial management lecturer knows my name liao...
she was going thru some questions and asked if we understand or not...
then she looked my direction and asked "francis how? can understand?"
argH, i thought being quiet often means u wun get called...
bad thing was we were inside the lecture theatre...
and everyone was looking, trying to find who is francis...
"u look so deep in thought"
yea, i was thinking abt someone alright...
not pondering abt the questions...
i dun understand the whole subject anyway...
juz pray i dun cock up for this exam on the 22nd...
one week earlier than the other tests...
"wat realli happened?" - hong
1:58 PM
October 07, 2003 COLOURED.
ITP?
not too bothered abt that...
its not one of my priorities right now...
but the lecturer in charge is oreadi hinting to us...
abt not all of us are guaranteed places once the itp starts next yr...
keep forwarding internship emails asking for interested students...
his golden words of advice : dun be too picky...
my golden words of advice : u take us for fools?
i mean i have no hard feelings for the lecturer...
i juz dun like the way the companies hire ppl...
it states clearly ITP starts in january...
currently the emails are looking for ppl able to start work in November...
at first it sounds nice...
like so good ar, no nd worry abt no job for itp liao...
that is if ur mind is as simple as jingjing...
why do companies wan to hire in november n not january then start work...
becos to them they are saving money...
no nd to hire part time to help them do things...
u know part time are more ex. than interns...
december is always the busiest year...
when everything has to be recorded...
check inventory...
check accounts...
check all sorts of things that have been covered by webs all over...
companies often get shorthanded becos of that...
and thats when the interns like jingjing come into play...
although there are some companies that are nice...
they let u do things according to wat u have been taught...
but most juz give all the sai kang to u...
paperwork, enquiry, prepare coffee, photocopier...
all dumb things they give u do...
n the employees there juz chit chat abt wat beckham wore underneath his pants...
i oso duno how some students are called up by companies to go for interviews...
i thought they must have some outstanding grades to receive offers...
surprise thing weide was called up...
his attendance was 2nd worst to dj...
his grades... were so-so...
biggest shock was that he didnt write the resume at all...
and we oso got no idea how the company got hold of his contacts 2...
its a weird world...
i always thought young adults would rather die than be caught being kiasu...
jimmy, chiobu n i were at FC 3 looking for seats...
found 1 empty table and walked towards it...
but another person came from the other direction n got the table first...
like that still neber mind, since he didnt saw us coming...
and we were walkin quite slowly...
so we continue looking around...
another table was empty and we walked towards it...
how close were we? about 1m away...
then this group of lamos...
2 of them rushed to the table and put their bags down...
i m pissed...
surely they must have seen us approaching...
i was about to put down my bag on the chair liao loh...
so i juz stood there...
while the lamos group came over...
one by one i bumped their shoulders hard...
they obviously duno the meaning of death...
i was so wanting to hear them shout "buay song ar"
but they didnt mutter a single word...
anyway we juz walked away wif black faces...
in the end we juz takeaway food to MLT2...
"i cant forget that first look" - hong
12:03 PM
October 05, 2003 COLOURED.
chiobu called early in the morning...
wanted me to come down n have breakfast wif him...
i still nd some sleep okie...
really getting lousy in swimming now...
lead takumi at the 10th lap...
trailing for the next 40 laps...
been losing ever since he went ns...
i wun say ive slacked...
my speed is juz the same as before, maybe even faster...
juz that his legs are crazy...
cant believe that i actually spent 3 hours at the pool...
now my schedule is not in order liao...
ate lunch n slept at 5...
woke up at 6 n slept again...
woke up n its 7:30...
now its bad, i've missed the kickoff...
got out of bed and no dinner's prepared...
changed clothes and prepared to go chijmes...
then realised my sister oso haben eat...
which means i have to go out n buy for her...
which oso means i can onli order takeaway otherwise she will complain...
which in the end means going out for food, n going out again for soccer...
by the time i finished my dinner, the match's over...
changed location to chinese garden coffeshop for the 10pm match...
spent all my money on the drinks...
by the time match ended, its midnight...
SMRT is so fucked up...
it allows ppl to take train to boon lay up til 12:08am...
last train to pasir ris ::: 11:43pm...
i onli wanted to get to jurong east interchange so i can switch trains...
last train from JE to AMK ::: 12:05am...
the times are deceptive as i later found out...
more on that later...
asked the staff whether still got train to JE or not n he said no...
bloody fuck...
the train terminal is between JE n Clementi...
y cant it make JE the last stop...
die die must pasir ris meh...
and the trains at JE are still moving...
to hell wif east west line...
took the opposite direction towards boon lay...
there's 172 which will take me to cck interchange...
then i remembered the last bus is oreadi over...
alighted at lakeside for hope of 180...
the problem wif buses near the bus interchange is the last bus went off too early...
now im stranded in lakeside...
taxis...
too bad i spent my money on drinks...
insufficient funds for cabs...
unless im a lady, its hard to get a free ride...
my grandmother's house juz across the road...
but i dun bother going up...
i juz wan to get home...
which means i juz have to walk home...
as simple as that...
actually i kinda regretted taking mrt the opposite direction...
cos it meant i have to walk an extra station...
watever, life is full of setbacks...
juz keep on moving...
when i started my journey its was drizzling...
crying for me? thank you... but i prefer SMRT have some common sense...
12:15am...
i began walking...
it was quite easy at first...
the routes were familiar and i know a number of shortcuts...
after all i have walked from batok to jurong west once...
walked past miaoling's residence...
not sure if she moved out oreadi or not...
past my old house...
past the long canal where i used to run...
past the JE swimming pool n gym...
past the coffeeshop where i watched my soccer juz now...
past Jurong polyclinic which was renovated...
throughout my journey, several buses appeared...
98, 99, 334, 335...
either im too far from the nearest bus stop or i neber see properly...
not sure if i made the rite decision in wearing slippers...
so slippery, but at least i wun have peanut butter feet...
for that day, i juz wished all the pavements were flooded...
the sand is causing abrasion between my feet n slippers...
i as looking for puddles of water all over so i can get rid of the sand...
past shuhan's n zhengyang's house...
cut inside kenny's...
i shouldnt have...
but its the fastest shortcut from JE to Bukit Batok...
the neighbourhood there is so dimly lit...
i couldnt see where my feet is landing sometimes...
nearly tripped thrice there...
and its so full of sand...
ouch ouch ouch my way to bernard's n chye heng's...
so happy to find puddle of water at the bus stop...
wif sand cleared from my feet...
quack quack quack my way to takumi's...
thought of cutting thru batok mrt to 187 bus route...
when i saw the sign...
ANG MO KIO 3 MINS...
i couldnt believe it...
wat i know is that last train from yew tee to amk is 12:13am...
but its impossible...
by the time i reached batok it must be ard 45 mins of my journey...
which means its roughly around 1am liao...
get wat i mean abt SMRT having no brains?
really super dulan...
no train at midnite...
yet northsouth line is still operating at 1am...
i was all wet...
the rain neber seem to stop...
watever, life is never smooth...
juz get on wif life and u survived...
took the 945 route hoping to reach swiss cottage faster than 187 route...
then i saw crossroads...
sian diao, i not familiar with the bus routes...
lucky got road sign...
saw that sign pointing to little guilin...
then reached a T-junction...
this 1 is easy, juz follow regent heights and im thru to guilin...
thought of taking a stroll in guilin n trying to catch couples in the action...
but i dun suppose they like some hot action when its raining and all the mozzies...
wats more the lights were not that bright...
wait i walked straight into the water i oso duno...
takumi n i used to have night hikes during npcc training camps...
i was always a zombie that time...
sleepy and dragging my feet along...
its was kinda stupid, walking for the sake of depriving us from some nice sleep...
this time i dun feel sleepy...
i dun feel tired...
the legs juz seem to walk on its own...
cos they know i have to get home...
coffeeshop is full of customers at this unearthly time...
there's no gd food over there aniway...
we always head for the furthest 1...
past shuping's n beng's house...
past swiss...
past cdans...
past batok driving centre...
and then im lost...
mrt route between gombak n cck got this jungle in between...
theres no way i walking inside the jungle esp when its raining...
took a bloody long detour round...
trying to find a way across...
u wouldnt know how happy i was when i saw LRT tracks...
and some neighbourhoods...
past Keat Hong station...
past South View station...
the next thing i knew, i was at cck mrt...
and for the first time, i finally get to check the time...
2:24am...
hmm, 2 hours to me seems like 1 hour...
cck is the most lifeliest place...
small groups of youths all over sitting down crappin...
they dun look beng to me, juz look like kids...
other places are juz like ghost towns...
took the extremely long overhead bridge to william's...
past limbang shopping centre and the rest is familiar territory...
reached yew tee mrt finally...
updated time is 2:45...
then i juz slowed down and started strolling back home...
my legs are oreadi killing me...
and the rain has juz stopped...
cos it knows i have reached my target...
once i reached my block...
i juz felt... NUMB
i cant find any other way to describe...
after walking from lakeside all the way to yew tee...
thats 6 mrt stops in total...
juz like a monk on a pilgrim...
he juz feel stoned...
while i was walking...
i juz thought abt my whole life...
walking alone for so long gives me a chance to reflect on things...
n wat might happen if i did some things n if i undid some things...
sometimes its juz tt 1 thing which will change ur direction of life completely...
i think i have attained nirvana...
call me honggy DA SHI next time...
call me crazy...
n its most prolly u haben reached my stage yet...
then u know its not crazy...
everything happens for a reason...
how much distance have i covered? i duno...
i juz hoped its long enuf to survivied the road march when i go ns...
how many petrol stations have i walked past?
totally lost count...
how many taxis are there waiting to be hired?
likely to flag down 1 100times faster than u try in the morning...
lets juz say i saw 10 taxis lining up in the taxi stand outside cck...
and some taxis stop at the bus stops...
some taxi drivers were sleeping inside...
one even didnt turn the engine on...
trying to commit suicide eh...
who are more active at night?
indians, without a doubt...
more chinese in cck...
but indians ultimately rule the night...
how many police cars are patrolling the streets?
surprise surprise... ZILCH...
its true, i didnt come across any police car...
all i see are cabs cabs n more cabs...
cabs ensure singapore's safety while we are still asleep...
they are the true heroes...
number of mozzies bites i have?
again another surprise.... ZILCH...
its raining, its damp...
the perfect conditions for mozzies to come out n play...
bukit batok n gombak areas are all abt greenery somemore...
but not a single love bite is visible...
updated time 3am...
opened the door and mi sister was awake...
she couldnt sleep becos of her cough...
and she thought i was a burglar...
my sister questioned me the next morning...
i told her i walked home from bukit batok...
nobody would believe me if i said i started from lakeside anyway...
n i think my parents will think im bullshitting...
does anybody care?
does anybody bother?
does anybody wonder?
nobody cares, cos its none of their business...
went online post blog and went off...
if nobody appreciate ur existence, then juz ignore them...
cos its juz ur life, u dun nd ppl to control ur life...
but right now, i nd ppl...
i nd ppl to massage my legs thank you...
"shagged yet again" - hong
11:22 PM
i am the super infector alright...
bryant was absent yesterday cos he's sick...
toy was sniffing away and now he's having a fever...
junia is beginning to cough...
jonathan oso about to cough...
weili is down with cough...
my sister yesterday cough, now is down wif fever...
almost every single 1 that have been in contact wif me all become sick liao...
but toy prefers to blame it on the hot weather...
i mean we were always playing soccer under the hot sun...
and soon we were inside the airconditioned room attending lessons...
like the chinese saying...
bu si cai guai...
after sweating it out we always feel thirsty...
it didnt help that all water coolers are cold water...
which onli makes the cough worse...
i know a lot are not fans of fisherman's extra strongs...
but its a sellout today...
all of them took a lozenge from my pack...
went to school early today to test out my newly edited program...
it works nicely, realli a relief...
now onli left the receiving part which other pro programs cant even do...
i think we need lecturer's help liao...
but from wat he has done so far...
i tink rely on him sure mati...
he onli gave us a pathetic lousy code...
sano got his lecturer helping out...
some group paid their way to pass...
some rely on bfs to get things done...
chiobu got the industrial ppl to help...
his case was funny...
somewat like an exchange...
he helped them do some excercises and in return they did his fyp...
wat do my group have?
zilch...
but we cant be compared to chicken's grp...
their lecturer bo chap and they now still haben started anything yet...
life should be playing hangman 24/7...
heck i neber follow maths lessons liao...
was getting too high on hangman...
it was a total wipeout...
got most of the words correct...
its juz like pitting anomalic vs honggy in trivia...
anomalic always gets this super long crazy streak b4 honggy extra cuts in to score 1...
except that in this case i m the anomalic and my classmates are honggys...
i wanted cs during the break...
they wanted soccer...
sian loh...
neber tell me in advance...
then i neber bring my equipment...
no towel, no shorts, no shirt watever...
duno wat is wrong wif the teams that wanna challenged us...
tell them play friend friend they always whacked...
duno how to follow instructions izzit...
weili's toenail was bleeding becos they anihow ram...
my shoes were gone juz like that...
tattered n torn...
like that african guy no money wear laoya shoe run marathon...
i promised my group i will do some questions for wireless mini...
onli researched a bit b4 giving up...
theres not much info on bluetooth...
a lot all focus on the brands' products...
and the answers are quite constrasting...
one website says this, another website says that, so contradicting...
not much videos or music to download...
they are always slow in getting new videos available...
have lots of difficulty finding dance videos...
cant find marilyn manson's mobscene either...
juz have to wait til december then i go plunder EFNET and all their videos...
"i shagged" - hong
3:35 AM
October 03, 2003 COLOURED.
bryant is such an ass...
neber turn up today...
n i oreadi told my mother i neber go home eat liao...
sian diao nd to have thick skin to go back home n asked her to cook my share...
but i tink he sick or sth...
yesterday he bring water bottle liao...
and now toy is feeling sick...
maybe i m the super infector...
the cough still haben cleared up yet...
now im on fisherman's extra strongs...
software class today was dreadful...
our group dun have anything to show for the miniproject...
while the rest were busy consulting the lecturer on how to carry on...
the more i think the more i stress...
thats the main problem with ppl...
always tink too much and worry their asses out...
so when i think that bryant n toy are going to die wif me...
i felt better...
maths lecturer can be scary at times...
whenever he walks past a person, he always call out his name...
n i was shocked when he knew my name...
not many lecturers bother to...
but he's an exception...
like die die must know all the names and faces in his class...
its a rarity that we actually turned up for the software lecture...
so used to skipping that we oreadi forgotten the exact venue...
theres a reason why we're there of cos...
lecturer was going thru wat will be tested for the lab test next week...
but like quite useless...
we couldnt see from the back...
not that we tried to see...
jonathan was dozing away...
chiobu, toy n i were playing hangman...
we were there juz to make up the numbers...
but the lab test seems scary alright...
forgotten how to do J# programming liao...
once thursday is over, its always time to relax...
yea n #stfu was rejected, lol...
sorri abt that takumi mistake la...
but the 2nd one i dun tink is his problem...
onli the 3rd n 4th attempts maybe...
if its meant to be, then set it free...
if its meant to be, it'll come back u see...
anyway it shouldnt be a problem finding another 1 rite...
who knows, Q is juz waiting for that special occasion to arrive...
there's nothing u can say
there's nothing u can do
there's nothing in between
you know the truth
- Our Lady Peace "Not Enough"
i am so bad...
i did something really bad...
but i juz cant help it...
"tell me why am i to blame" - hong
5:42 PM
October 02, 2003 COLOURED.
4 weeks gone and still not running...
and no gym either...
final year is really no time to relax at all...
first time i ever feel that i not enuf time to do things...
first n second yr is always so sian nothing to do...
now its flooding projects and it just cant seem to stop...
fyp's minor part in the last stage...
the last major stage unable to continue becos duno how to do...
have to hand it to toy for finding out the checksum for each of the 11000 numbers...
tink if he take the mensa test sure can join member liao...
he juz found 100 numbers' checksum manually...
and he began to find out the sequence and draw out a table...
even my lecturer oso cant see the pattern...
after he explained a bit to me then i know how to use his table liao...
asked him how he derived his table...
he juz answered that he was juz lucky...
anyway, his part was done...
except he still waiting for my major part...
which i think is impossible to finish...
bryant like neber do anything liek that...
but its okie, he can settle the report...
hacking mini project is as good as finished...
if u have ppl like jonathan n chiobu, things are always done the right way...
chiobu actually go n connect up the 4 firewalls together and testing it out...
jonathan was juz confirming the firewall commands...
the rest of the 2 groups were busy discussing how to break ppl's legs...
sometimes i feel a bit guilty...
always relying on chiobu n jonathan to deliver the goods...
one wonders how come they so free to help others...
not that i dun wan to do, is duno how to do...
bryant doesnt seem to be doing much in all the projects so far...
oso duno wat is happening to him nowadays liao...
like lan lan like that...
he even asked me go taka watch new face comp. after lessons later...
i say c how first then he say y i always not on 1...
wth, he got gf and he still wanna go c...
me no gf and i not interested to c...
maybe go c manhunt then i go eh, turning gay...
seldom see my sec sch frens in sp...
its always those once-a-year thing...
that i get to c yilong, kenny, junhao, kent, bernard, hangwei and the likes...
with the exception of guangsheng whom i see weekly...
while i always see the same old faces of strangers...
u can see them virtually every day...
even though u dun share the same class or course as them...
always bound to spot them during break time...
something like turn left turn right like that...
always searching for the one...
but the one is actually the stranger which u see everyday...
the onli problem is the whole place is surrounded by guys...
so the ones are all guys...
eeEe...
i should have planted BoA in the campus somewhere...
supposed to hand in software miniproject tomorrow...
but our group havent done a thing yet...
and im looking at my old school year books...
finding someone who i thought was from swiss...
the face is so bloody familiar...
happened to look at my pics in the books as well...
my sec 1 to 3 years look so... marilyn manson...
damn gross, but at least manson still looks cool...
sec 4 looks like extreme makeover...
now i know why ppl say i look so listless...
"is it meant to be..." - hong
4:13 PM
October 01, 2003 COLOURED.
yesterday it was the jaw...
now its my ass...
never felt so tight b4...
think mines firmer than ricky martin liao...
listening to [Korn - Did My Time]
im crazy over that song now...
best bet for my song of the year 2003...
and its a must have for rock fans...
oh n that white-feathered earring which angelina jolie wore for that vid is nice!
mp3shits have the strokes's room on fire album...
until now i still cant catch what the lead is singing...
their music is always louder than the voice...
i have it anyway...
cos i know u must always grab it while its hot...
now i have problems getting fuel, dave matthews band, safri duo, savage garden's albums...
becos the server's always down during that period when im getting the music...
did the pre ns documentation thing...
i did some guessing filling in my parents particulars...
i know their birthdays, but i duno their date of birth...
did some minor calculations n some common sense to find out the answers...
jonathan went for his checkup the other day and was certified PES A...
which really puzzles me...
wat separates PES A n PES B anyway...
i thought it was the intelligence...
but he said he purposely gave some wrong answers for his aptitude test...
cant be physical either...
hes not so much into sports...
went to ginza for some counterstrike after 1pm...
didnt had lunch today...
dun see the pt of having fish n chips and still feeling hungry when i reached home...
juz a total waste of money...
i cant play at all...
becos the shop used pirated CD keys sia...
onli 7 ppl can connect, i extra no more valid cd key to use...
sucks, i should complain to the authorities...
heading back towards school when bryant realised he forgot to take his hp...
he went back searching but couldnt find out...
i think losing hps is part of life...
i always hear ppl losing their hps...
if it is so common, how come i have neber come across an unattended hp?
i am so unlucky...
"looking and searching" - hong
9:57 AM
|
October 31, 2003 COLOURED.
went on a video spree today...
spent 3 hours online getting 20 videos...
thank goodness some servers were fast during noontime...
normally i have to wait quite long to complete 1...
i should be learning drums...
or guitars, bass, turntables, keyboards...
maybe i can try my hand in growling as well...
but i did none of them...
ppl into rock normally have bands of their own...
me listen as a rock fan and juz a rock band wannabe only...
having seen a number of rock videos...
i roughly have an idea how...
to groom urself to become a huge rock star!
#1 rock star essentials
- hair
- preferably dreadlocks
- bald is nice 2
- lil bit of hair here n there (balding in short)
- unkempt hair
- beatles hair always score hits
- no afro hair ard pls
- gelled up hair longer than 10cm
- normal length strictly unacceptable
- face
- no makeup
- tons of white powder
- burning red lips
- excessive pouting
- facial hair scores tremendously
- piercings on eyebrows
- piercings on lower lip
- CMI faces can always use masks
- masks must be scary
- pikachu n facial masks auto reject
- body
- stick thin
- plump
- 6ft min height (for lead)
- below 1.7m max
- anything ard 1.7m to 1.8m cant qualify
- acceptable BMI means disqualification
- tattoos
- piercings
- clothes
- black
- undersized clothes (rare)
- jumpsuits
- shirt n tie
- fish nets
- oversized t-shirts
- nude is eligible
- bright colors acceptable
- PINK IS NOT!
- physical abilities
- able to jump
- smashing guitars
- love to fly
- able to swallow mike
- know basics of ping pong
- elastic fingers
- drink urine
- swallow roaches
- power neck muscles
- loves vomiting
- face gets red easily
- suck women's toes
- kiss guys (FAGGOT!)
- rubber faces
- masturbate live on tv
- point middle fingers professionally
dreadlocks is quite an essential seriously...
without them, u lost ur ability to head bang...
n if u cant produce headbanging music...
then u might as well be a britney spears fan...
beatles hair is oso quite in...
esp. bands in europe...
their videos look so retro...
i thought they were produced in the 80s...
but they get u qutie far alright...
tink the strokes, the hives, the white stripes...
oasis, lots n lots more...
botak is oso in...
the very MAN look...
even nicer if they have a menacing face...
ppl wouldnt dare rejecting their albums...
all look like straight out of prison like that...
juz released from murder or anything to do wid violence...
the balding part is reserved specially for radiohead...
onli weird ppl can be exceptions...
grow taller by 10cm is quite a good idea by static-x...
but wayne is oreadi tall enuf...
and quite waste of money n time to make long hair stand...
remember u're not a star yet...
if u're shy or have hideous features...
masks are nice...
and they're popular...
slipknot, mudvayne, blue man group...
provided u can breathe well in them...
slipknot did it to get the high feeling due to lack of air...
or u can go ard molesting ur fans...
since they cant recognize ur face anyway...
no makeup is really required...
but if u wan to be uber popular...
then its a must...
as white as possible...
as white as snow white...
add a bit of lipstick...
best if draw wrongly...
like marilyn manson n his enlarged red lips...
or if u wan to be like brody (the distillers) oso can...
but it onli applies to gers...
no sights of beards or goatees or moustache put u in a bad position...
unkempt is the key...
and it usually means u must look rugged...
remember heck-care looks always score...
rock stars can n only be stick thin or plump...
acceptable weight is abnormal...
either they spent all their money on good food...
or too busy makin love wif siliconed-enhaced women to eat...
or spent all on crack n alcohol n fags...
tattoos show u are tough n mean...
but no hello kitty or i love mummy tattoos pls...
even marilyn manson would be scared of u...
dress code for all rockers: smart formal...
quite a lot wear suits...
but jumpsuits look cool 2...
esp those can zipped up to cover the whole neck...
exceptions like fred (limpbizkit) xtra wear tshirt onli...
nude is quite common as well...
u can always have the gers screaming at ur body...
when there are no muscles no watever...
juz bones or beer bellies...
and gers.. like them????
no wonder all the fit fit guys all turned gay...
its neber easy to be in a band...
ur jumping must be veri good...
for the thinners can try 3 storeys...
for plump can try 1 storey...
yesh... POD guitarist n bassist can jump to 1 storey high...
if their video is to be believed...
AFI guitarist n bassist can do it even better...
3 storeys n hanging in mid air...
unless u're rich, DUN smash ur guitars...
its a real waste...
and u may hurt urself in the process if u're not careful...
wif all the splinters flying ard...
u can always master the art of smashing sometime later eh...
love to fly means moshing...
u have to trust the fans below...
otherwise when u throw urself in the air
n no one's there to catch u...
if they catch good loh...
but ppl will be groping everywhere...
even guys (FAGGOT!)
and lose some clothing here n there...
juz make sure u dun have a knife stuck at ur back...
learn to handle the mike well...
most hold the mike so clos they have no problems swallowing it...
wat does ping pong has got to do wif rock aniway...
nothing really...
but POD beat team china in a ping pong competition...
and that is realli something...
ping pong [POD - BOOM]
elastic fingers [KORN - DID MY TIME]
swallow roaches [PAPA ROACH - BETWEEN ANGELS AND INSECTS]
suck womens toes [MARILYN MANSON - THIS IS THE NEW SHIT]
interested juz download the videos n u get wat i mean...
sucking toes i m interested...
wonder how it taste like...
i tried suckin my own when i was young...
didnt try it again when i grow up...
u must have neck muscles to growl...
to screech, to scream...
juz abt anything that is considered noise...
but music to the rock fan's ears...
give it up for jimmy urine (MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE)
he urines, he drinks it and he kisses ppl after that...
and guys wanna kiss him 2...
enuf said, i wouldnt wan to be near him...
masturbating at the crowd may be common at some concerts...
but live on tv?
slipknot did exactly that on late night wif conan o'brien
of cos its fake...
the pinochio mask man was doing it on his long nose...
middle fingers must be fleshy enuf...
mine canot make it...
thin n long...
and i cant point it straight...
tink thats abt the minimum requirements...
im sure there are still lots to add to the list...
but thats all i can tink abt for the moment...
doesnt really necessary mean u must have all the requirements to be a rock star...
impossible for 1 to have long hair n be bald at the same time rite...
so long as u have met a requirement for each feature...
then u're quite safe...
after that its juz left to ur talents n attitude...
it will go a long way to super stardom...
juz remember to name me in ur to-thank list
if u have taken my advice...
and become the next big band...
and win lots of rewards...
if u dun, try not to remember me eh...
cos i dun wan to be responsible for any failures...
i have a reputation to protect...
100% success rate is wat it says on my CV...
i wrote too much liao...
this rock topic supposed to be a short 1...
but i got too carried away and crap more nonsense into it...
i have more serious stuff to say...
but not now, next time...
i still haben give my statistical review of my site yet...
saw my site counter stats and spot some interesting info...
will be telling more over next few days...
death of one is a tragedy
death of millions is juz a statistic
"the end has no end" - hong
1:32 PM
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October 30, 2003 COLOURED.
Pale angel go away
Come again some other day
The devil has my ear today
I'll never hear of what you say
Promised I would find a little solace
And some piece of mind
Whatever just as long as I don't feel so
Desperate and Ravenous
I'm so weak and powerless over you
2:39 PM
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October 27, 2003 COLOURED.
lanjiao ppl always give u lanjiao work
ppl wif lanjiao shit-looking hair always give u lanjiao work
ppl wif lanjiao attitude always give u lanjiao work
get this straight in ur brains...
and if u duno hokkien then dun act like u're some kinda pro...
sia mi 'bo cham' 'bo cham'...
its damn BO CHAP la...
who r u to call us 'bo cham' when u give this kinda lanjiao report...
okay, maybe toy doesnt care but i do...
do u even consider this a report when its juz screenshots...
heck even my ancestors can come back from the dead and do it...
and damn that lecturer too...
for giving such a hard project...
though he was kind in extending deadline to monday...
i still stick by my motto...
"if u duno how to do, no matter how much time u have, u juz cant finish it"
sian manz...
thought of giving him some work to do...
ended up i have to cover his ass...
duno how many times have i cover bthk's asses liao...
i'll neber forget that time where i stay up whole night to finish up everything...
its doesnt pay to be hardworking...
it pays to be xialan...
and it pays to be playing ard...
since u have the goody-two-shoes ppl like me covering...
i think its time to change...
time to be the bad guy...
but its too late...
no more projects anymore...
juz exams and exams...
now then i know hamsters are nocturnal creatures...
my sister juz bought 1 recently...
they are so lively at night...
run on the wheel like veri fun like that...
run so fast n so long...
they could have broken the records for any race liao...
and all too often they juz spin out of control...
and are sent flying...
gave a rather crap presentation of the program...
we only know how it works 1 hour b4 that...
and bryant was busy printing screenshots...
at least he's doing something...
lecturer commented abt us how to pass like that...
honestly the program was a good 1...
too bad we dun know how it works...
so we cant market chiobu's work well...
anyway the lecturer keeps a copy of the program for marking...
my brain is suffering from months of inactivity...
i cant get things in my head now...
think later have to read more...
otherwise my results sure veri jialat...
"bu xiang bei ze yi fu hei se de ci pang" - hong
11:59 PM
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my father has been hit by the durian craze...
he bought durians from the uncle living on 15th floor...
and the uncle told him that they were taken from somewhere...
on that faithful night, the inevitable happened...
my father went on a trip wif him to get durians...
he didnt come back until 6 in the morning...
he brought back 2 gunny sacks full of durians...
sickening, paradise for most, hell for me...
gave away quite a lot but still too much to handle...
ended up having durian kueh for breakfast...
luckily there was still some bread...
otherwise i would have starved...
ever since that incident...
he was all hyped up...
juz bought a new torchlight to add to his equipment...
and got some relatives to get in the act as well...
durians suck, gimme chicken anytime...
i am not serious in my studies again...
since i will be quite busy tml...
i reckon i wun have enuf time to study for tuesday's exam...
thought i will do a bit of read up today...
ended up playing games and cant stop...
n i cant get over the fact that i have lost weight...
thumb n middle finger can cover the wrist liao...
the medicine seems to be working well...
seems to, cos im safer at home...
see how i will fare tml in school...
whenever its vibrating, it starts to get itchy...
but not the same as last time...
a bit better...
of cos it better work...
this antibiotic is poison...
"wat u wan is inside" - hong
12:04 AM
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October 26, 2003 COLOURED.
i know its been a long time since i've updated the blog...
i did write something...
juz that i no time to go publish...
actually its juz a plain excuse for being lazy...
below are some excerpts i have wrote over the days...
so most of it doesn't make much sense at all...
yesterday was quite hectic...
not becos i was celebrating my bdae...
but doing some last minute stuff for the report...
we made the lecturer wait for 15 minutes...
and had quite a lousy presentation to show as well...
supposed to hand in the report b4hand...
ended up handing it in 3 hours after the presentation is over...
the bad thing about downloading albums b4 it was even released...
was that the lyrics were different...
lol, i juz found out when i was going thru sevendust's songs...
lyrics on the official site and the songs i have are different...
those leaked songs are after all still incomplete...
normally they juz need a lil bit of touch-up b4 it hit the stores...
but overall the music is the same, juz that some words are different only...
financial test was quite free frag...
there's no motivation to do the test at all...
how to chiong when u juz realized u have scored 90 for the previous assignment...
like toy, he loves to calculate how much effort is needed to pass...
even if this test i get 5/100 i will still be able to pass...
jimmy has burned new anime for me...
getbackers, recommended by my frens...
once i managed to get cable then i tink i will download anime liao...
not forgetting all the rock vidz...
but currently the situation doesnt look good...
there's no reply from SGI yet(HENG ar)
the lecturer is looking for ppl who is competent in html n asp database...
bthk has replied to the mail without delay...
i mean that is perhaps the most easiest of stuff to do...
since we have some experience in it...
who the hell wan to work in unix environment dealing wif all the servers...
see how, maybe its fated that i have to learn new things...
learn new stuff is a good sign...
but the fear of being familiar wif it is there...
come wat may...
maybe i suggest setting up a gigolo network...
not only can i clear my ITP...
the money will pay well i reckon...
so many tai-tais in sg are so lonely...
thursday was a bore...
went to school expecting some scoldings and got none...
cos the software project we didnt do anything...
no report, the program chiobu can't complete...
fucking thing was only toy n i was present...
toy wasn't supposed to come at all...
he said he need the presentation marks to pass...
bryant? overslept and didnt come...
ass got the cheek to ask how's the report...
lecturer gave a last deadline on monday...
guessed we were real lucky...
which allows us to slack again...
chiong cs with toy n chiobu...
as usual i was at the bottom ranks...
and those kids are realli pro...
wear sch u so blatant the auntie oso let them play...
started to write my part for fyp report...
all the stupid alignments, fonts...
neber standardize then juz throw at me...
waste time editing sia...
boost up to 50 pages inclusive of appendices and contents...
bryant called again...
the greeting i get from him nowadays is "hows the report"
y cant he say sth like "boa visited ur blog"
of cos i didnt do anything for the software report...
i dun know how to and i dun wan to do it...
have to let them do things...
otherwise they everytime so free then im busy with stuff...
saturday morning...
my mother is forcing me to drink the veggie juice again...
she has been drinking it ever since the doctor indicated that she has high cholesterol...
you wan to drink then drink mah...
dun pull others to the waters as well...
the taste's not that bad really...
but i hate to be woken up at 8am everyday...
no thanks to that juice-maker...
my mother was surprised when i said im going to the doctor today...
its so unlike me...
normally i wait until ppl nag then i go...
but this time is different...
i am sick of coughing...
i spent 1/3 of the year coughing...
i dun wan to spend 6 months continuous jerking up n down...
doctor looked at me and said "i hope u're not seeing me for ur cough problems again"...
take a look at my medical history...
down with fever around once a year...
recently its cough cough cough...
he did that usual and weird procedure of listening to heartbeats...
checked my throat and stated its red n swollen...
prescribe new antibiotics -- ofloxacin to me
he oso did some marketing...
saying that these pills sell more expensive outside...
and no one can match his rate that he is offering me...
mentioned something about $30 but my medical fee was $28...
wif a additional bottle of cough syrup...
off to school with the intention of doing some blog reading...
got bored soon...
why is nobody updating their blogs...
the government must pass a law...
that states blogging daily is mandatory...
those breaking the rules will be punished severely...
write for goodness sake, WRITE...
no wonder blogger sometimes lagging...
cos too many ppl create blogs but neber update for ages...
they should do some account locking like hotmail like that...
make the service harder, better, faster, stronger man...
to the lab that was touted by jonathan as the free printing lab...
no doubt i was curious about it...
imagine wat those honest ppl used up how much money on their cash cards to print stuff...
i saw junia n chiobu there...
and they were printing notes which was my main purpose there...
after they taught me that printing bug i went about doing my job...
i printed...
all on color printing...
ayz, when its free, better make good use of it...
leave the black n white printer to the ppl paying for it...
i tink its the only lab where the paper from the color printer runs out faster than the black n white one...
in the end waste my time sia...
took the paper tray from the black n white n load it to the color 1 to resume printing...
so mah fun loh...
the thickness of the notes is quite obscene...
2 modules onli leh...
and the paper that i got is as thick as pure physics n pure chemistry books combined...
nevertheless, i cant complain...
its real value for money -- oops -- its FOC...
next i tried to find some boa sites...
hoping to print gigantic pictures of her and then laminating it...
but i cant find nice pictures, only printed 1 in the end...
went on researching for palm reading...
i am getting really fascinated wif it now...
the lines are there for a reason...
and how the fingers are shaped oso tells a person's personality...
too bad i onli got a brief...
when i have more time, i will start from the basics...
all i know right now is im looking for one who has short fingers...
or anyone whose last finger is exactly like mine...
long and thin, deviates from the rest of the fingers...
others need not apply...
"i wish i can die right now"
a familiar phrase for most people...
wat the heck is their aim anyway...
to gain sympathy from others?
wanting ppl to console them?
when will adults ever grow up...
when it comes to D-Day...
guess who wans to live now...
be glad that u r still alive...
cos u regret it when the time comes...
u tink its so fun to die meh...
u will cause ur family to go bankrupt manz...
funeral so expensive, coffin now oso got brand 1...
if no money then they bo bian put inside black garbage bag...
and down to the rubbish chute liao...
"perhaps" - hong
1:29 AM
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October 25, 2003 COLOURED.
palm reading? try this flash to see wat age are u suitable for marriage!
http://game.qd.sd.cn/game/update/20011127101916.swf
11:43 AM
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I know that it never goes away
All I feel, everything I'm not today
So I try and I try to make everything right
I don't feel like I'm doing it, it affects me
You wouldn't listen even if I told you
Who the fuck am I to say?
You're too busy with the lies they sold you
Another cure to fix your day
Open wide for all the shit they feed you
While the TV defecates
And blindly walk wherever they will lead you
While the edges slowly fray
I know that everything can change
What I need is to open up again
So never again will I look back in vain
'Cause today's not the past
I don't need to relive it
Are you satisfied?
I've given all i can
And are you pacified
Or do you want more from me
I've learned that this life's not just a game
Just a line between the pleasures and the pain
i would be flattered if u tink i wrote the above stuff...
11:32 AM
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October 20, 2003 COLOURED.
[Deftones - Be Quiet And Drive]
the song which most rock fans has...
i like them wheenver their songs are featured on OST...
but i actually deleted their hexagram album...
cos its noise to me... ;P
SCV should show MTV2...
not that idiotic MTV Asia...
if got MTV2 then shiok man...
all the rock videos...
no pop vidz at all!!!
quote of the day: "gentlemen, goodnite... ladies, good morning"
ever since that day...
the damn beer has brought my cough back...
which gives me more reason to hate it...
on the eve of such an important day...
i couldnt get to sleep...
and i actually dreamt of senzi...
everything seems so real...
we were alone for a while n spoke little...
then i duno how uchu managed to get into my dream...
next thing i knew was its time to prepare for that interview...
some memories juz cant seem to fade away...
if i say week 14 is the make or break week, i'll take back my word...
week 15 is a killer...
usually meant to spent more time at home than in school...
all becos of that interview, lab test, 2 reports, 1 program, 1 demostration...
and not forgeting that financial exam on wednesday as well...
i can only think about relaxing after thursday...
and thursday is of cos the last day of school...
watever...
monday is over, left 3 more days...
wats 3 more days compared to 4 months...
i will get thru it...
most prolly wif lots of cheating included...
reports i can always get ideas from here n there n call it my own...
actually i dun like stealing other groups' reports...
not that i have integrity...
juz that their reports suck...
its true, and i think the lecturers will agree deep inside their asses 2...
not that im being mean...
but wat can u say when they hand in a 40-page report compared to our 10-page 1...
i wun be surprised if both groups are given the same marks...
the most the 40-page 1 will get a lil lil bit more than us...
after all the reports we write in poly no need to be so detailed...
juz the important points and we score...
heck theres no need to follow the report format at all...
they always love to put one whole chunk of rubbish...
which the lecturer has problems pinpointing where the main focus is...
lecturers should love me...
for writing short n precise reports...
its the same thing for exams...
some of my frens quite dulan when they write so many...
and i write 1 word only yet both answers are correct...
its juz a simple way...
why cant people use their brains...
maybe they used their brains too much...
i know i like ppl who are sophisticated...
but too sophisticated is real DUMB...
"i wish u to be happy n nothing else" - hong
11:09 PM
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taxis are so dumb...
impossible to find 1 in yew tee...
rushed to take mrt to clementi...
and one long line of cabs waiting at the taxi stand...
how stupid can they get?
if i blur blur wait at yew tee i think i confirm late...
science park realli kan ulu...
there is a bus...
SBS 92...
but i dun see any bus coming around from anywhere...
there is a shuttle bus though...
not sure where it goes...
anyway i was early enuf to take a dump in the toilet...
stomachache since this whole morning....
reached the 3rd floor of the damn Rutherford...
door says PUSH...
i did push ...
but it didnt move...
damn those security doors...
i look around trying to find a way in...
maybe they will arrive at 10 sharp i thought...
then i saw the doorbell that looks more like a switch...
press liao then the ppl inside keep asking: looking for?
finally i was let in...
damn those retards...
i was standing at the reception...
no one was at the counter...
5 minutes gone and im still standing down there waiting for people to serve the lord...
finally that kenneth came...
another guy along him is lionel who is losing his hair....
interview was juz about the same as the communication skills for work mock interview ...
i felt kinda out of place...
didnt bring my resume at all...
n i took off my earring before hand as well...
but the other 5 studs are still intact...
juz in case they wanna get rough wif me...
strong points, weak points...
they were grilling me like veri fun like tat...
sometimes u juz have to play around wif them...
smile smile...
wait til i kill u, stupid ass...
anyway he was assessing me...
and he was right about 1 thing manz...
i did have poor man-management skills...
but wats the use...
if selected, im not going to take his place....
i m an intern...
not someone who can boss over all the staff to massage my whole body...
made a grave mistake by not fielding questions...
shit i 4get to ask how they choose their candidates...
but judging their expressions...
i tink they juz abt random pick ppl from the database...
interview was half hour long...
and he wished me luck for the later lab test...
yea rite... if i wasnt selected then its realli a waste of my time...
even if im selected, i tink i will hate it...
realli burns pockets...
take cab take cab...
and they were all in shirt n pants...
watever...
leave it to fate...
im more than happy to work in sp...
juz that the money sucks big time...
11:18 AM
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October 19, 2003 COLOURED.
REMEMBER 18 OCT
its bloody more significant than 5 OCT...
experience all the sour sweet bitter hot tastes of life in juz 1 day...
that is 18 OCT...
i have only 1 thing on my mind that day...
to find that silicon graphics location...
i thought it was a piece of cake...
as long as u have legs, u will find it...
i even brought a compass along for easy navigation...
unluckily the compass sucks, the needle is very lagging...
free gift from SAF 1, no wonder SAF personnel mati...
cos they cant even get their compass rite...
alighted at commonwealth and juz walked south-east...
then i realized wat streetdirectory.com indicates can be so deceiving...
its says 1.75km direct from the mrt to the building...
direct means a straight line...
doesnt include any obstacles...
its juz like me asking u to walk from gombak to cck mrt...
the distance is damn short...
but getting there by foot means a super long detour...
same for this rutherford building n commonwealth mrt...
first obstacle was a railway track...
fences were put up...
there is a minidoor somewhere...
but the other end is the railway is the forest...
walked past one whole neighbourhood trying to find a way past the other side...
i ended up walking towards east n near queenstown mrt...
i knew that i was in the wrong direction when i reached queensway shopping...
anyway i have to see AYE somewhere to get to rutherford...
and i learnt many things about the expressway...
that it is damn long...
it has many parts...
the more i follow the weirder it gets...
soon i reached bukit merah...
way off my original location...
call off the search and next destination: nearest mrt...
once i find cpmb it was easy to walk...
the route was way too familiar...
redhill mrt is easy to spot after all...
one thing i notice about commonwealth queensways area...
the flats are old...
those kind which ur grandparents most likely live in since 1970s...
where there is no finishing for the floor at all...
and the windows are those glass panes...
and wooden doors...
many places of worship!
indian temple n christian church side by side...
then later at queenstown got another indian temple n chinese temple together...
not bad eh, i thought singaporeans are racists...
damn those condos 2...
basket have to walk 1 big round to get to another place...
cannot cut thru for shortcut 1...
went to esplanade to catch some live action of soccer...
my first time there...
and i got problems finding colors at the bay (at or by, cant remember)
took the escalator out and saw the waters...
the sight was something...
something very unsingaporean...
i feel like i was a tourist instead of a local for a while...
found the colors thing...
shit have to eat at there then can watch...
toured esplanade for a while...
very brief...
cos i had no idea how to get to mrt...
and im lost inside the building...
rushed to chinese garden n to my more familiar kopitiam territory...
i tink i regret moving out of jurong west...
there got so many coffeeshops...
and they actually have SCV installed...
how good can it get when u have access to 3 coffeeshops within a minute's walk...
and 2 of them have SCV!!!
yew tee region have around 5 kopitiams...
within a 1km radius...
and none of them have SCV...
its always interesting to watch soccer in kopitiams
ppl sharing ur table are placing bets over the phone with bookies...
a football newbie come n watch will learn all the bookie terms in record time...
u have ppl cursing all over...
and i can always look at gers with their bfs when im bored...
the thought of u doing something with her right in front of the bf can be so...
must be quite a very shiok feeling, HIGH HIGH HIGH...
nasty, im nasty...
but of cos those are juz funny thoughts when u have nothing to do...
and one uncle treat me free beer...
i let him share table then he offer to buy me drinks...
at first he wanted to get me another glass of lemon barley which i've had liao...
then he oreadi ordered beer for his group of frens...
and he suggested i join them for drinking...
i kept refusing but he insisted...
quote of the day: "NEVER MIND LAH, MOST IMPORTANT IS LONG ZHONG HAPPY AR!"
that was exactly wat he said...
and he told the beer auntie to go get another glass...
and so i was there drinking seriously for the first time...
when i was young i onli took sips from my dad b4 i go eeeYucKz...
beer sucks, wine sucks...
neber liked them, won't like them now still...
he got 4 bottles of heineken beer for the 5 of us...
and that beer lady...
aunties become ladies when ppl gets a bit tipsy...
keep refilling my glass...
sian, duno how much i drink liao...
but at least for the first time...
ppl believe im over 18...
i lied to him when he asked if i have ever drink b4...
told him i only did it during CNYs...
if i tell him i neber drink at all then he wun believe...
juz like i tell the ppl that boa n i are together...
wun believe loh...
to remain at the kopitiam u must meet some requirements...
understand hokkien is a must...
everyone communicate in hokkien...
even that uncle who treat me oso talk to me in hokkien...
but later he ask me...
when i keep answering him in chinese...
i wasnt born to learn hokkien okay, but i understand the language...
hmmm, i have upgraded...
from a auntie killer to uncle killer...
what more can i kill?
after the match i went direct to jurong east mrt...
i thought i will be able to catch the train...
but hell no...
the train was still there when i arrived...
but when i wanted to get past the gantry, the train is departing...
and the officer as usual say n0 more...
SMRT realli sucks...
didnt want to walk at all...
oreadi walked a mini this afternoon liao...
flagged down a cab...
and wat i did for 3 hours the other day can be achieved with 15 mins by car...
but the price is rather...
soon my pockets will be full of holes...
check the company location yet again...
dun tink it is possible to walk from any mrt station at all...
looks like i have to do it the anomalic way...
actually its more of the gers' way...
the problem of having the company located in such a "nice" location...
is that u have to be rich...
cos its onli accessible by car...
i reckon all the staff drives eh...
unless they have some company transport...
lab test haben prepare...
report duno wat to write...
i oso duno why m i so worried abt the interview...
more like a waste of time n money...
watever, juz get it done n over with...
haben even study for my financial test on wednesday...
the way i deal with things has always been seen as a hack-care attitude...
considering how others would have done them differently...
its no surprise why i have few friends...
i dun realli cherish them...
yet im a extreme loyalist...
juz that most of the time they didnt know...
or they know but i juz pretend pretend...
surely i deserve a better hiearchical status than the rest...
but when u're grouped among the same as those punks...
wat can u do...
loyalty doesnt pay...
then its my decision to be loyal...
they didnt demand from me...
anyway im keeping records...
this year is the turning point of my life...
so many things have happened...
oreadi started on my 31st December entry...
usually the longest entry of the year...
check out the previous year entry to verify...
but i reckon 2004 is the year when i will really change to a completely different person...
provided things turn out as expected...
but im still keeping my options open...
not telling wat they are...
all i know is 2004 will affect my life for perhaps the next 10 years...
"stop faking for the public, lets do it for REAL" - hong
4:33 PM
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October 17, 2003 COLOURED.
SGI....
Silicon Graphics...
offices at 39 locations worldwide...
kena have to go interview...
shit, im going to piss on my pants now...
wats bad was i replied to the mail...
and addressed the person as MR LIM...
the reply came back and with a HIGHLIGHTED MS LIM...
not a nice way to start off...
most prolly i'll be bumped out within a minute of the interview on monday...
12:41 PM
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October 16, 2003 COLOURED.
2 different worlds...
thats what we are...
why must humans be so sophisticated...
although i cant deny that cheem ppl attract me...
juz as they are attracted to my simpleness...
"that person is the richest when he has the cheapest pleasures"
its irritating when people are pestering you...
its even more irritating when there's no one to bother you...
even though you are right there in their faces...
even though you are not transparent...
they treat you like you're some non-existant piece of shit...
what do they take you for...
someone who only exist when they need your help?
some kind of last resort eh...
one day i promise...
they will regret...
a tofu for a tofu...
whenever tv shows ppl who have successfully slim down...
im not interested in how they do it...
more curious about how do they gain weight in such a short time...
so while others are taking down useful tips on how to lose weight...
im looking for the gain 20kg in 6 months tips...
can you separate
separate me from the sand
is it not too late
to try and start again
can you separate
all the darkness from my eyes
i cant see under the water...
me googles are fogged...
me hair too long...
danger danger keep clear...
swim little bit then stop liao...
its hard to swim many laps when ur googles are fogged...
woodlands is better than chinese garden in many ways...
its cheap...
more muscular men...
realii alot leh...
compared to me ar...
i tink my figure more suited for supermodel, minus the leg hair...
must psycho ownself to eat more liao...
the water is not salty...
all of them tanned until like black pigs...
the gers can swim many laps!
i got home and guess wat...
my sister said a company called while i was away...
im supposed to get back to them...
i dunoo...
not calling them yet...
i got phobia of calling strangers...
actually its not so scary wat...
but then, i juz dun dare to call...
duno watever company who call themselves SGI...
singapore gays institue?
anyway im not calling them...
if they interested then most prolly they will call again...
most likely they will select other candidates though...
watever, they were wrong to call in the afternoon...
i should be in school you know...
juz that i so happened to be going swimming n skipping lessons...
can't really blame them anyway...
the only way to contact me was my home...
and email...
but email most likely i juz delete unless the subject is sth special...
after all ben affleck, j lo, and other stars tried writing to me...
and they all ended up in the trash without opening the mail at all...
lecturer said something about the not guaranteed jobs for everyone...
those without jobs most prolly end up in SP doing some nice work...
and getting paid $8 per day, not hour...
im more comfortable with SP but that means i dun have enuf to settle some bills...
esp when im going to get hp n cable in december...
attached to other companies is the better way to get more money...
since i turned it down liao, juz leave to fate...
if i happen to pick the call, then im going...
else i will juz ignore...
"when i m gone, say hello for me" - hong
11:12 PM
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October 14, 2003 COLOURED.
zui ai ni de ren shi wo
ni ze me she de wo nan guo
zai wo zui xu yao ni de shi hou
ni mei suo ni ju hua jiu zou
saw an advert the other day and i tink i m suffering from depression...
insomnia...
loss of appetite...
stress...
temperamental...
suffer setback...
but i think thats wat most gers go thru...
loss of appetite = dieting for them...
as i said the week before, monday is crunchtime...
the day that makes the difference between a repeat year and a nice break...
2 presentations, 3 reports, 4 lecturers, 1 demostration, 1 logbook...
as usual have to wear formal...
i always look lam nua when i wear formal...
becos the shirt n pants are not my size at all...
first up is the fyp presentation...
cock up the first time when i try my program...
b4 the presentation i oreadi tested it liao can work leh...
turns out that the serial cable too loose, so the device cannot receive...
my presentation sucks as usual...
i didnt come prepared for all the presentations today anyway...
last night was busy writing the 6 months worth of progress reports...
the only time when i excel in presentation was for that report writing one...
that was when BTHK started...
and thats when i finally belong to a group...
end of presentation...
lecturer came to see us after the co-examiner left...
all he said was "beautiful, nice, very good"...
toy managed to peek at the co-examiner's marking...
he said all 3 of us were given 8 8 8 8 8 8...
8 out of wat?
if 10 then happi la
if 15 then still okie
if 20 then LIKE THAT HOW TO PASS...
the co-examiner seems to be impressed by bryant n toy's speech...
mine? watever...
but im not too worried...
bryant's part theoretically was to write the receive part...
as expected, we cant get it to work at all...
practically, everything in Visual C++ is done by me. PERIOD...
yea, i wrote that reading part for him...
actually he understand wat my code says...
becos he has done his research, juz that he didnt come out wif a program...
for toy, he know nuts about visual c++...
cos he juz cant bother to go find out...
anyway anyway...
i dun care abt who gets more credit...
as long as i can see a PASS for FYP when i get my results slip i happi liao...
wireless presentation was a lousy affair...
i duno where the lecturer was looking at...
looking everywhere but not at the screen and us...
among the groups, ours was the most simplest powerpoint...
done by your truly...
i neber believed in lengthy slides...
we only have 11 slides while others have double or triple that...
the best thing is i only get to present for 1 slide only...
and i finished my presentation in less than 1 minute too...
somemore that question i didnt do...
i did none of the questions anyway...
i was in charge of the powerpoint slides and report...
challenge 2 demo...
dun understand wat the ACL indicate...
lucky the lecturer juz go around clicking things by himself...
its bad...
its so unlike me these days...
i cant eat proper meals...
have to skip my lunch in order to finish my dinner...
i realli duno wat caused this...
maybe im beginning to get sick of SP food...
and my eyes are wandering...
always prefer men's bodies than womens' in the past...
always like to compare compare and then must aim to be better than them...
now prefer to look at gers liao...
not sure how much weight i have lost as well...
need to do a lot of cardio excerises to get me eating normally again...
lost the hunger...
lost the anger...
lost the bite...
im spent...
i actually went to taka wif bryant n toy on saturday to watch teens model search...
yikes, teens from 14 onwards...
something is realli wrong wif me...
not that we wanted to look at them...
bryant n i were more interested in Jamie Teo as one of the stars...
i remember her as the onli female that is worthy to win that competition...
and the first celebrity whom i have written an email to...
how does it feel to write a mail to someone is singapore universe 2001?
i stopped writing after a while...
sometime she replies the messages...
but usually after some weeks later...
it must be quite sick to reply the same thing over n over to every single fan...
spotted more stars there as well...
andrew seow, nick shen, randall, tianyang, xiaoxin (very fat)...
jamie, yvonne, deborah sim, michelle liow, le yao...
deborah sim, michelle liow, le yao are totally unrecognizable...
maybe we were standing too far to have a clear view...
le yao juz doesnt seem like le yao...
first up was the cheerleaders...
3 guys threw a ger up...
one guy obviously no strength as she wasnt thrown straight up...
she was way out of postion...
so then the guys were lagging...
never see where she is falling...
and we hear this loud thud...
landed hard on her buttocks from the height of about 1 storey...
amazing thing is she still can stand up by herself...
and continuing the routine...
bravo, most gers will stay there n cry like baby liao...
then the competition and the contestants...
which brings back the memories...
why i hate those contests...
the supermodel, ms world, ms universe...
duno how they pick up ppl from the streets and call them beautiful...
thats why singapore neber wins any of the international contest...
a smart woman can go n be ms singapore n bimbos always fail...
too bad international judges like bimbos...
and all men too...
beauty is skin deep...
not wats underneath...
no one wants to know wats underneath anyway...
ppl onli consider character after hanging out wif them for some time...
first impressions its always skin deep...
SKIN DEEP
get that in ur head...
deemed ugly initially...
but will be labelled as cute overtime...
back to the competition...
F8 n M9 caught my eye...
i tink F8 will win the competition easily juz by the first dance intro...
she has wat the judges always look for : X FACTOR
one who knows how to flirt with the camera...
or wat those sports illustrated photographers termed it: make love to the camera...
once u joined the contest, u juz have to be confident...
and go strut ur stuff...
most were juz walking quite fast...
too nervous or juz to make up the numbers...
M9 was out of place wif all the teens...
he was oreadi 20...
and its obvious he goes to gym regularly...
the rest of the guys were all skinny and bones...
like that how to lose...
flipping thru some magazines when i saw a familiar name pop up...
'specially designed for barons strong brew by gail chen'
everyone associates barons with bikinis...
after all they were the ones who intro the bikini party...
didnt realise that her designs are used by the models...
she's someone i know from irc some time ago...
mentioned sth abt being a designer and stuff...
now oreadi duno where is she liao...
sometimes u juz neber know...
the next person u chat wif might end up being a minister...
or the most notorious criminal...
this week has been quite relaxing...
after monday is gone, suddenly it feels like holidays...
like i said to bryant n toy...
i can finally afford to fall sick...
and hopefully gain my appetite back...
those 2 lazy pigs are at home duno doing wat...
i juz went to school today to ensure my attendance doesn't fall below average...
and also to do thw wireless quiz online...
4 out of 10...
my first quiz i onli got 3 out of 10...
i suck at quizzes...
it feels good to get the fyp presentation done early than the rest of the groups...
suddenly i seem to have more friends than normal...
all kneeling down worshipping me...
hoping for some golden words of advice from me...
i made that up about the kneeling down...
but its true ppl have been asking me abt the preparation liao...
i would love to dispense some tips...
at $50 a pop...
it helps that bryant n toy were absent today...
which means i m the sole survivor...
but i feel for chicken...
his lecturer is worse than ours...
he told them to meet him yesterday and he didnt turn up...
today same thing and he put aeroplane again...
chicken oreadi dulan liao...
bring his laptop to school twice for nothing...
actually he should be in our group...
too bad the group allocation max 3 members...
initially i fear abt the situation when we have to axe 1 of us...
bryant n toy are bound to stick together...
so its between me n chicken...
chicken is more pro in many aspects than me...
but lucky i was chosen...
and jimmy managed to recruit chicken...
maybe thats juz life...
the capable like toy dun wan to do work...
the lousy like me is forced to read up n becoem capable...
actually i tink i should be the leader instead of bryant...
for all the things i have done, but i rather not...
i excel when im a follower, but i suck when i have to lead...
experience says it all...
npcc i was excellent in a squad...
but once the seniors appoint me as sec 2 trainer, its downhill from there...
i have very lousy man-management...
and i prefer to be controlled than to control...
ooh i feels so like a xiao nan ren...
but nvm la, gers nowadays so domineering...
ys did a little palm reading on me today...
he said i will lead a better life if i was born a ger...
wat was he trying to get at huh...
maybe my hands look too feminine to be like a man...
he oso said i will marry at an early age...
around 20 to 30...
if its true then good for me...
if im still single after 30 then its juz life...
always interested in palm reading...
wanted to read up in the past but then too lazy...
tink after my exams i will camp at borders liao...
then read everything about fortune telling...
its a good excuse to hold a lday's hands too!
"if i could feel again, will u tell me now or wait til i wake up?" - hong
11:17 PM
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October 11, 2003 COLOURED.
one helluva song!
Ill Nino - How Can I Live
I am so alike you
In so many ways
I know I�m just a copy
That carries on the strain
But, we make the same mistakes
�Cause, we are one and the same
We leave behind the stain
That will never separate
All the lies in me
All that dies in me
How can I live without you?
All that lies in me
All that dies in me
How can I live without you?
I am your mirror image
I�m all you left behind
You made me what I am
But who the hell am I?
But, we make the same mistakes
�Cause, we are one and the same
We leave behind the stain
That will never separate
All the lies in me
All that dies in me
How can I live without you?
All that lies in me
All that dies in me
How can I live without you?
We�ve made the same mistakes
We are one and the same
How can I live
Do you think of me?
Do you dream of me?
I always dream about you
Do you think of me?
Do you dream of me?
I always dream about you
1:32 AM
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October 10, 2003 COLOURED.
Which OS are You?
8:02 PM
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quote of the day: Polish Yourself; Crush The Others
as usual i cant get my java programming test to work...
same as the other 16 students...
onli 4 managed to complete it...
my tutorial lecturer was surprised by our honesty...
his class apparently had over 90% workable programs...
and thats becos the answers had been leaked out...
but anyway, quite confident i can pass this test...
if he marks the same way as he did for the first test...
the next 3 days will be stress stress and more stress...
altogether we need to finish a report by this week...
another report by monday...
3 presentations on monday...
and that BIG fyp draft report by monday...
financial management report to be handed up on friday...
i haben do anything yet...
i was left with the last part which is worth onli a nice 5 points...
yea, 5 points for summarizing the whole report...
when i haben even look at wat my other group members have done...
its okie, we are used to last-minute things...
i can do the 5 marks summarization on the deadline itself...
oh i forgot, i did the cover page as well...
that itself is a important contribution...
wireless mini project i oso no need to do any questions...
my job is juz write the whole report and create a powerpoint presentation as well...
thank goodness bryant did his questions early...
then i can start working on the report a bit rather than chiong during the weekend...
do u know the last time i touched powerpoint was when i was in pri6...
so alot of the things i all forget liao...
duno how to add textbox, add title, edit the things...
in the end i have to contend wif ready made templates...
hacking have to show the challenge #2 to the lecturer...
i have to go read up on the accesslists...
cos im not involved during the whole process at all...
kudos to toy...
he realli should be in mensa...
fyp is the most worrying thing...
it sucks, why do we have to present on monday...
like that means we have less time to do...
but i oreadi some sort of give up on the last part liao...
i oso have no idea how to go about writing my part for report...
no way we can get a high grade if we cant do the last part...
juz hope that its juz sufficient to warrant a pass...
i dun mind scraping thru...
ever since i got 25 for tt stupid wireless lab test...
otherwise most subjects im confident of maintaining As n Bs...
jimmy burned some episodes of Ikkitousen for me...
sometimes i realli duno wat to do wif anime...
the more u see the more u get hooked to it...
ultimately it depends on the storyline...
i liked those which are funny...
be it lame, slapstick, crude, or dirty jokes...
and there must oso be some action...
which is why i like Pokemon...
Ikkitousen is all abt fighting n challenging others...
becos of the magmatamas they inherited from past warriors...
nice anime, too bad kids central cant show...
cos there's too many upskirts...
the lead character is female, so wat to do...
"the tough onli gets softer with some TLC" - hong
2:05 PM
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October 09, 2003 COLOURED.
missed wireless tutorial cos i was watching jacky last night...
they were showing the singapore version...
which makes me feel so unsingaporean...
they feature many places which i last visited during the stone age...
singapore zoo? last visit: primary school
sentosa? last visit: primary school
high class restaurant: not even once
st nicholas: dun know where is it
esplanade: haben even walked around b4
they should show more heartland stuff...
like that if all the tourists come n expect the same things as the show then how...
n they should go n eat at coffeeshops...
those restaurants food sucks...
waste money n not worth it at all...
most of the good food are in coffeeshops after all...
entered MLT2 n the very next thing i did was to leave it...
jimmy said ys brought his ball and on his way to school...
toy n bryant didnt come today which is a pity...
anyway i oso duno why i go school...
juz go for the sake of going...
my fyp lecturer sucks man...
die die wan us to find out by ourselves...
dun wan to help us at all...
he tink like that can spur us on meh...
being able to work on 2 parts without his help is oreadi veri good liao...
the bloody last part...
i tried so many programs to try to capture the received data...
all the evaluation programs, all the free source... all failed miserably...
n becos of that, i doubt that it is possible to receive anything at all...
duno wats the problem wif him oso...
other groups last day on wednesday...
he die die wan us to present on monday...
juz to accomodate him ar?
dun mind, as long as he give us some codes, which he didnt at all...
he oso told us to come back on saturday to try n finish up...
he tink we lazy izzit...
onli go school then got do...
he duno how many hours i have spent at home trying to figure out...
no matter how much time they allow is neber enough...
when u're stuck, u juz stuck...
theres no way u can get out...
unless there is some model answer...
he kept saying its possible to receive data...
but i prefer to see it wif my own eyes...
now my financial management lecturer knows my name liao...
she was going thru some questions and asked if we understand or not...
then she looked my direction and asked "francis how? can understand?"
argH, i thought being quiet often means u wun get called...
bad thing was we were inside the lecture theatre...
and everyone was looking, trying to find who is francis...
"u look so deep in thought"
yea, i was thinking abt someone alright...
not pondering abt the questions...
i dun understand the whole subject anyway...
juz pray i dun cock up for this exam on the 22nd...
one week earlier than the other tests...
"wat realli happened?" - hong
1:58 PM
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October 07, 2003 COLOURED.
ITP?
not too bothered abt that...
its not one of my priorities right now...
but the lecturer in charge is oreadi hinting to us...
abt not all of us are guaranteed places once the itp starts next yr...
keep forwarding internship emails asking for interested students...
his golden words of advice : dun be too picky...
my golden words of advice : u take us for fools?
i mean i have no hard feelings for the lecturer...
i juz dun like the way the companies hire ppl...
it states clearly ITP starts in january...
currently the emails are looking for ppl able to start work in November...
at first it sounds nice...
like so good ar, no nd worry abt no job for itp liao...
that is if ur mind is as simple as jingjing...
why do companies wan to hire in november n not january then start work...
becos to them they are saving money...
no nd to hire part time to help them do things...
u know part time are more ex. than interns...
december is always the busiest year...
when everything has to be recorded...
check inventory...
check accounts...
check all sorts of things that have been covered by webs all over...
companies often get shorthanded becos of that...
and thats when the interns like jingjing come into play...
although there are some companies that are nice...
they let u do things according to wat u have been taught...
but most juz give all the sai kang to u...
paperwork, enquiry, prepare coffee, photocopier...
all dumb things they give u do...
n the employees there juz chit chat abt wat beckham wore underneath his pants...
i oso duno how some students are called up by companies to go for interviews...
i thought they must have some outstanding grades to receive offers...
surprise thing weide was called up...
his attendance was 2nd worst to dj...
his grades... were so-so...
biggest shock was that he didnt write the resume at all...
and we oso got no idea how the company got hold of his contacts 2...
its a weird world...
i always thought young adults would rather die than be caught being kiasu...
jimmy, chiobu n i were at FC 3 looking for seats...
found 1 empty table and walked towards it...
but another person came from the other direction n got the table first...
like that still neber mind, since he didnt saw us coming...
and we were walkin quite slowly...
so we continue looking around...
another table was empty and we walked towards it...
how close were we? about 1m away...
then this group of lamos...
2 of them rushed to the table and put their bags down...
i m pissed...
surely they must have seen us approaching...
i was about to put down my bag on the chair liao loh...
so i juz stood there...
while the lamos group came over...
one by one i bumped their shoulders hard...
they obviously duno the meaning of death...
i was so wanting to hear them shout "buay song ar"
but they didnt mutter a single word...
anyway we juz walked away wif black faces...
in the end we juz takeaway food to MLT2...
"i cant forget that first look" - hong
12:03 PM
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October 05, 2003 COLOURED.
chiobu called early in the morning...
wanted me to come down n have breakfast wif him...
i still nd some sleep okie...
really getting lousy in swimming now...
lead takumi at the 10th lap...
trailing for the next 40 laps...
been losing ever since he went ns...
i wun say ive slacked...
my speed is juz the same as before, maybe even faster...
juz that his legs are crazy...
cant believe that i actually spent 3 hours at the pool...
now my schedule is not in order liao...
ate lunch n slept at 5...
woke up at 6 n slept again...
woke up n its 7:30...
now its bad, i've missed the kickoff...
got out of bed and no dinner's prepared...
changed clothes and prepared to go chijmes...
then realised my sister oso haben eat...
which means i have to go out n buy for her...
which oso means i can onli order takeaway otherwise she will complain...
which in the end means going out for food, n going out again for soccer...
by the time i finished my dinner, the match's over...
changed location to chinese garden coffeshop for the 10pm match...
spent all my money on the drinks...
by the time match ended, its midnight...
SMRT is so fucked up...
it allows ppl to take train to boon lay up til 12:08am...
last train to pasir ris ::: 11:43pm...
i onli wanted to get to jurong east interchange so i can switch trains...
last train from JE to AMK ::: 12:05am...
the times are deceptive as i later found out...
more on that later...
asked the staff whether still got train to JE or not n he said no...
bloody fuck...
the train terminal is between JE n Clementi...
y cant it make JE the last stop...
die die must pasir ris meh...
and the trains at JE are still moving...
to hell wif east west line...
took the opposite direction towards boon lay...
there's 172 which will take me to cck interchange...
then i remembered the last bus is oreadi over...
alighted at lakeside for hope of 180...
the problem wif buses near the bus interchange is the last bus went off too early...
now im stranded in lakeside...
taxis...
too bad i spent my money on drinks...
insufficient funds for cabs...
unless im a lady, its hard to get a free ride...
my grandmother's house juz across the road...
but i dun bother going up...
i juz wan to get home...
which means i juz have to walk home...
as simple as that...
actually i kinda regretted taking mrt the opposite direction...
cos it meant i have to walk an extra station...
watever, life is full of setbacks...
juz keep on moving...
when i started my journey its was drizzling...
crying for me? thank you... but i prefer SMRT have some common sense...
12:15am...
i began walking...
it was quite easy at first...
the routes were familiar and i know a number of shortcuts...
after all i have walked from batok to jurong west once...
walked past miaoling's residence...
not sure if she moved out oreadi or not...
past my old house...
past the long canal where i used to run...
past the JE swimming pool n gym...
past the coffeeshop where i watched my soccer juz now...
past Jurong polyclinic which was renovated...
throughout my journey, several buses appeared...
98, 99, 334, 335...
either im too far from the nearest bus stop or i neber see properly...
not sure if i made the rite decision in wearing slippers...
so slippery, but at least i wun have peanut butter feet...
for that day, i juz wished all the pavements were flooded...
the sand is causing abrasion between my feet n slippers...
i as looking for puddles of water all over so i can get rid of the sand...
past shuhan's n zhengyang's house...
cut inside kenny's...
i shouldnt have...
but its the fastest shortcut from JE to Bukit Batok...
the neighbourhood there is so dimly lit...
i couldnt see where my feet is landing sometimes...
nearly tripped thrice there...
and its so full of sand...
ouch ouch ouch my way to bernard's n chye heng's...
so happy to find puddle of water at the bus stop...
wif sand cleared from my feet...
quack quack quack my way to takumi's...
thought of cutting thru batok mrt to 187 bus route...
when i saw the sign...
ANG MO KIO 3 MINS...
i couldnt believe it...
wat i know is that last train from yew tee to amk is 12:13am...
but its impossible...
by the time i reached batok it must be ard 45 mins of my journey...
which means its roughly around 1am liao...
get wat i mean abt SMRT having no brains?
really super dulan...
no train at midnite...
yet northsouth line is still operating at 1am...
i was all wet...
the rain neber seem to stop...
watever, life is never smooth...
juz get on wif life and u survived...
took the 945 route hoping to reach swiss cottage faster than 187 route...
then i saw crossroads...
sian diao, i not familiar with the bus routes...
lucky got road sign...
saw that sign pointing to little guilin...
then reached a T-junction...
this 1 is easy, juz follow regent heights and im thru to guilin...
thought of taking a stroll in guilin n trying to catch couples in the action...
but i dun suppose they like some hot action when its raining and all the mozzies...
wats more the lights were not that bright...
wait i walked straight into the water i oso duno...
takumi n i used to have night hikes during npcc training camps...
i was always a zombie that time...
sleepy and dragging my feet along...
its was kinda stupid, walking for the sake of depriving us from some nice sleep...
this time i dun feel sleepy...
i dun feel tired...
the legs juz seem to walk on its own...
cos they know i have to get home...
coffeeshop is full of customers at this unearthly time...
there's no gd food over there aniway...
we always head for the furthest 1...
past shuping's n beng's house...
past swiss...
past cdans...
past batok driving centre...
and then im lost...
mrt route between gombak n cck got this jungle in between...
theres no way i walking inside the jungle esp when its raining...
took a bloody long detour round...
trying to find a way across...
u wouldnt know how happy i was when i saw LRT tracks...
and some neighbourhoods...
past Keat Hong station...
past South View station...
the next thing i knew, i was at cck mrt...
and for the first time, i finally get to check the time...
2:24am...
hmm, 2 hours to me seems like 1 hour...
cck is the most lifeliest place...
small groups of youths all over sitting down crappin...
they dun look beng to me, juz look like kids...
other places are juz like ghost towns...
took the extremely long overhead bridge to william's...
past limbang shopping centre and the rest is familiar territory...
reached yew tee mrt finally...
updated time is 2:45...
then i juz slowed down and started strolling back home...
my legs are oreadi killing me...
and the rain has juz stopped...
cos it knows i have reached my target...
once i reached my block...
i juz felt... NUMB
i cant find any other way to describe...
after walking from lakeside all the way to yew tee...
thats 6 mrt stops in total...
juz like a monk on a pilgrim...
he juz feel stoned...
while i was walking...
i juz thought abt my whole life...
walking alone for so long gives me a chance to reflect on things...
n wat might happen if i did some things n if i undid some things...
sometimes its juz tt 1 thing which will change ur direction of life completely...
i think i have attained nirvana...
call me honggy DA SHI next time...
call me crazy...
n its most prolly u haben reached my stage yet...
then u know its not crazy...
everything happens for a reason...
how much distance have i covered? i duno...
i juz hoped its long enuf to survivied the road march when i go ns...
how many petrol stations have i walked past?
totally lost count...
how many taxis are there waiting to be hired?
likely to flag down 1 100times faster than u try in the morning...
lets juz say i saw 10 taxis lining up in the taxi stand outside cck...
and some taxis stop at the bus stops...
some taxi drivers were sleeping inside...
one even didnt turn the engine on...
trying to commit suicide eh...
who are more active at night?
indians, without a doubt...
more chinese in cck...
but indians ultimately rule the night...
how many police cars are patrolling the streets?
surprise surprise... ZILCH...
its true, i didnt come across any police car...
all i see are cabs cabs n more cabs...
cabs ensure singapore's safety while we are still asleep...
they are the true heroes...
number of mozzies bites i have?
again another surprise.... ZILCH...
its raining, its damp...
the perfect conditions for mozzies to come out n play...
bukit batok n gombak areas are all abt greenery somemore...
but not a single love bite is visible...
updated time 3am...
opened the door and mi sister was awake...
she couldnt sleep becos of her cough...
and she thought i was a burglar...
my sister questioned me the next morning...
i told her i walked home from bukit batok...
nobody would believe me if i said i started from lakeside anyway...
n i think my parents will think im bullshitting...
does anybody care?
does anybody bother?
does anybody wonder?
nobody cares, cos its none of their business...
went online post blog and went off...
if nobody appreciate ur existence, then juz ignore them...
cos its juz ur life, u dun nd ppl to control ur life...
but right now, i nd ppl...
i nd ppl to massage my legs thank you...
"shagged yet again" - hong
11:22 PM
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i am the super infector alright...
bryant was absent yesterday cos he's sick...
toy was sniffing away and now he's having a fever...
junia is beginning to cough...
jonathan oso about to cough...
weili is down with cough...
my sister yesterday cough, now is down wif fever...
almost every single 1 that have been in contact wif me all become sick liao...
but toy prefers to blame it on the hot weather...
i mean we were always playing soccer under the hot sun...
and soon we were inside the airconditioned room attending lessons...
like the chinese saying...
bu si cai guai...
after sweating it out we always feel thirsty...
it didnt help that all water coolers are cold water...
which onli makes the cough worse...
i know a lot are not fans of fisherman's extra strongs...
but its a sellout today...
all of them took a lozenge from my pack...
went to school early today to test out my newly edited program...
it works nicely, realli a relief...
now onli left the receiving part which other pro programs cant even do...
i think we need lecturer's help liao...
but from wat he has done so far...
i tink rely on him sure mati...
he onli gave us a pathetic lousy code...
sano got his lecturer helping out...
some group paid their way to pass...
some rely on bfs to get things done...
chiobu got the industrial ppl to help...
his case was funny...
somewat like an exchange...
he helped them do some excercises and in return they did his fyp...
wat do my group have?
zilch...
but we cant be compared to chicken's grp...
their lecturer bo chap and they now still haben started anything yet...
life should be playing hangman 24/7...
heck i neber follow maths lessons liao...
was getting too high on hangman...
it was a total wipeout...
got most of the words correct...
its juz like pitting anomalic vs honggy in trivia...
anomalic always gets this super long crazy streak b4 honggy extra cuts in to score 1...
except that in this case i m the anomalic and my classmates are honggys...
i wanted cs during the break...
they wanted soccer...
sian loh...
neber tell me in advance...
then i neber bring my equipment...
no towel, no shorts, no shirt watever...
duno wat is wrong wif the teams that wanna challenged us...
tell them play friend friend they always whacked...
duno how to follow instructions izzit...
weili's toenail was bleeding becos they anihow ram...
my shoes were gone juz like that...
tattered n torn...
like that african guy no money wear laoya shoe run marathon...
i promised my group i will do some questions for wireless mini...
onli researched a bit b4 giving up...
theres not much info on bluetooth...
a lot all focus on the brands' products...
and the answers are quite constrasting...
one website says this, another website says that, so contradicting...
not much videos or music to download...
they are always slow in getting new videos available...
have lots of difficulty finding dance videos...
cant find marilyn manson's mobscene either...
juz have to wait til december then i go plunder EFNET and all their videos...
"i shagged" - hong
3:35 AM
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October 03, 2003 COLOURED.
bryant is such an ass...
neber turn up today...
n i oreadi told my mother i neber go home eat liao...
sian diao nd to have thick skin to go back home n asked her to cook my share...
but i tink he sick or sth...
yesterday he bring water bottle liao...
and now toy is feeling sick...
maybe i m the super infector...
the cough still haben cleared up yet...
now im on fisherman's extra strongs...
software class today was dreadful...
our group dun have anything to show for the miniproject...
while the rest were busy consulting the lecturer on how to carry on...
the more i think the more i stress...
thats the main problem with ppl...
always tink too much and worry their asses out...
so when i think that bryant n toy are going to die wif me...
i felt better...
maths lecturer can be scary at times...
whenever he walks past a person, he always call out his name...
n i was shocked when he knew my name...
not many lecturers bother to...
but he's an exception...
like die die must know all the names and faces in his class...
its a rarity that we actually turned up for the software lecture...
so used to skipping that we oreadi forgotten the exact venue...
theres a reason why we're there of cos...
lecturer was going thru wat will be tested for the lab test next week...
but like quite useless...
we couldnt see from the back...
not that we tried to see...
jonathan was dozing away...
chiobu, toy n i were playing hangman...
we were there juz to make up the numbers...
but the lab test seems scary alright...
forgotten how to do J# programming liao...
once thursday is over, its always time to relax...
yea n #stfu was rejected, lol...
sorri abt that takumi mistake la...
but the 2nd one i dun tink is his problem...
onli the 3rd n 4th attempts maybe...
if its meant to be, then set it free...
if its meant to be, it'll come back u see...
anyway it shouldnt be a problem finding another 1 rite...
who knows, Q is juz waiting for that special occasion to arrive...
there's nothing u can say
there's nothing u can do
there's nothing in between
you know the truth
- Our Lady Peace "Not Enough"
i am so bad...
i did something really bad...
but i juz cant help it...
"tell me why am i to blame" - hong
5:42 PM
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October 02, 2003 COLOURED.
4 weeks gone and still not running...
and no gym either...
final year is really no time to relax at all...
first time i ever feel that i not enuf time to do things...
first n second yr is always so sian nothing to do...
now its flooding projects and it just cant seem to stop...
fyp's minor part in the last stage...
the last major stage unable to continue becos duno how to do...
have to hand it to toy for finding out the checksum for each of the 11000 numbers...
tink if he take the mensa test sure can join member liao...
he juz found 100 numbers' checksum manually...
and he began to find out the sequence and draw out a table...
even my lecturer oso cant see the pattern...
after he explained a bit to me then i know how to use his table liao...
asked him how he derived his table...
he juz answered that he was juz lucky...
anyway, his part was done...
except he still waiting for my major part...
which i think is impossible to finish...
bryant like neber do anything liek that...
but its okie, he can settle the report...
hacking mini project is as good as finished...
if u have ppl like jonathan n chiobu, things are always done the right way...
chiobu actually go n connect up the 4 firewalls together and testing it out...
jonathan was juz confirming the firewall commands...
the rest of the 2 groups were busy discussing how to break ppl's legs...
sometimes i feel a bit guilty...
always relying on chiobu n jonathan to deliver the goods...
one wonders how come they so free to help others...
not that i dun wan to do, is duno how to do...
bryant doesnt seem to be doing much in all the projects so far...
oso duno wat is happening to him nowadays liao...
like lan lan like that...
he even asked me go taka watch new face comp. after lessons later...
i say c how first then he say y i always not on 1...
wth, he got gf and he still wanna go c...
me no gf and i not interested to c...
maybe go c manhunt then i go eh, turning gay...
seldom see my sec sch frens in sp...
its always those once-a-year thing...
that i get to c yilong, kenny, junhao, kent, bernard, hangwei and the likes...
with the exception of guangsheng whom i see weekly...
while i always see the same old faces of strangers...
u can see them virtually every day...
even though u dun share the same class or course as them...
always bound to spot them during break time...
something like turn left turn right like that...
always searching for the one...
but the one is actually the stranger which u see everyday...
the onli problem is the whole place is surrounded by guys...
so the ones are all guys...
eeEe...
i should have planted BoA in the campus somewhere...
supposed to hand in software miniproject tomorrow...
but our group havent done a thing yet...
and im looking at my old school year books...
finding someone who i thought was from swiss...
the face is so bloody familiar...
happened to look at my pics in the books as well...
my sec 1 to 3 years look so... marilyn manson...
damn gross, but at least manson still looks cool...
sec 4 looks like extreme makeover...
now i know why ppl say i look so listless...
"is it meant to be..." - hong
4:13 PM
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October 01, 2003 COLOURED.
yesterday it was the jaw...
now its my ass...
never felt so tight b4...
think mines firmer than ricky martin liao...
listening to [Korn - Did My Time]
im crazy over that song now...
best bet for my song of the year 2003...
and its a must have for rock fans...
oh n that white-feathered earring which angelina jolie wore for that vid is nice!
mp3shits have the strokes's room on fire album...
until now i still cant catch what the lead is singing...
their music is always louder than the voice...
i have it anyway...
cos i know u must always grab it while its hot...
now i have problems getting fuel, dave matthews band, safri duo, savage garden's albums...
becos the server's always down during that period when im getting the music...
did the pre ns documentation thing...
i did some guessing filling in my parents particulars...
i know their birthdays, but i duno their date of birth...
did some minor calculations n some common sense to find out the answers...
jonathan went for his checkup the other day and was certified PES A...
which really puzzles me...
wat separates PES A n PES B anyway...
i thought it was the intelligence...
but he said he purposely gave some wrong answers for his aptitude test...
cant be physical either...
hes not so much into sports...
went to ginza for some counterstrike after 1pm...
didnt had lunch today...
dun see the pt of having fish n chips and still feeling hungry when i reached home...
juz a total waste of money...
i cant play at all...
becos the shop used pirated CD keys sia...
onli 7 ppl can connect, i extra no more valid cd key to use...
sucks, i should complain to the authorities...
heading back towards school when bryant realised he forgot to take his hp...
he went back searching but couldnt find out...
i think losing hps is part of life...
i always hear ppl losing their hps...
if it is so common, how come i have neber come across an unattended hp?
i am so unlucky...
"looking and searching" - hong
9:57 AM
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THE COLOURED PROFILE!
hello, i am F.Lee
Random Ramblings
Was a active blogger with some following in the past. now im back to blogging again for the world to listen to what i have to say almost about anything under the sky. some say im witty some say im bitchy but i am just a quiet and shy introvert with a different perspective from the rest. takes a long time to warm up to people but once i do, its hard to get rid of me. =D
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